Choice of My Heart
by Anne B
Summary: This takes place during the missing scenes from the PAX-TV Mini Series final episode.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: the Marshall-LeSourd Family, L.L.C, owns Catherine Marshall's beautiful story of Christy. We are in no way seeking profit or credit for her story. We are continuing the story of Christy for our own amusement only. The writers of the alt.tv.christy Round Robin and the Christy Mailing List invented any additions in story line and characters. The content of each story is the responsibility of the individual writer. The fanfic here is being posted as a service to the Christy mailing list, Pax Christy Forum and alt.tv.christy News Group. I used some sections from 'Choices of the Heart Part II' to enhance the story and to show where everything would fit together. Any similarities between this and other Fan Fiction is purely coincidental!

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~*~Choice of My Heart~*~

Omitted Scenes  
**_The Revelation ~ After the Storm_**

By Anne B.

When I awoke the next morning there was a lightness about me. I could see blue sky out the window and knew the storm had passed. Then I saw Neil and suddenly memories of the night before came flooding into my head. I felt sorry for him as I viewed him sleeping in such an uncomfortable position with his head leaning to the side! He lifted his head slowly and smiled sweetly at me.

"Good Morning!" Neil said as he rose from his chair. He set the blanket that was covering him on to the floor. "You gave me quite the scare. I apologize. This ordeal was all my fault." He placed his hand on my forehead checking for fever.

"Neil?" I said weakly as I reached for his hand on my head.

He shook his head and said, "We best get back to the mission. Alice will be worried sick." He paused. "I'll leave you to change into your things." Then he rose from the side of the bed, walking over to the door, he opened the it and paused for only a second and looked back at me as he went out onto the porch. 

I struggled to get into my clothes. It was more work than I could ever remember before, at least for this particular task! I got all of my outer clothing on, but I couldn't stand on my ankle to put on my coat. 

"Neil!?" I called.

"Did you call me Christy?" Neil said through the door. 

"Yes, I need your help." 

"Are you decent?"

"Yes. I just need help with my coat and boots."

Neil came in the door. He held me up and helped me with my coat so that I didn't have to stand on my ankle. He set me back down on the bed and helped put my boots on. I was still a little light-headed after that fever. I was confused and tired. That fever had taken more out of me than I realized. 

"Can you walk?" Neil asked me.

"I don't think so." I answered.

"Then allow me to carry you back to the mission."

"That's too far for you to carry me!" I cried.

"If it gets to be too much for me I'll let you know!" Neil stated. *His heart thrilled at the thought of carrying Christy in his arms all the way back to the mission!*

Neil swung me up into his arms. It certainly did feel comforting to be here. He had worked diligently all night long to care for me. And that prayer that he said during the night was amazing! I was elated to hear his words and to actually see him on his knees in prayer. Especially after he had blamed God for the Typhoid epidemic last spring. 

I wrapped my arms around his strong neck and laid my head on his broad shoulder. I listened to Neil's heartbeat. It was racing even before we started toward the mission. I hoped I wasn't too heavy for him to carry that far. But my ankle was too painful at the moment for me to walk on it, especially all the way back to the mission. We walked for a while and Neil set me down near a stream and he stopped to get a drink of water. He stooped down to the water. Using his hands he drank long and deep from the water. Then he splashed some onto his face. He stopped for a moment and stared out at the water.

"Tell me what you're thinking." I asked.

"I love the water. I'd rather spend the day fishing than doing just about anything else." Neil answered. *How could he tell her the truth? How carrying her in his arms was a dream come true. How could he tell her that having her so near was the most wonderful feeling he'd ever experienced? How could he tell her that he had stopped here only so that they would have more time alone together? He wanted to ask her to marry him, that's what he had come back to Cutter Gap to do, but after the way she reacted last night . . .? He had his great, great, great grandmother's ring in his pocket, the ring that had belonged to Neil MacNeill of Barra's Granny Jean back in the mid 1700's. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the cloth bag and peered inside, just to make sure that his treasured heirloom was still safe and sound. He just couldn't stand to be turned down again! No, he just couldn't be rejected another time! *

"What was that you were looking at?" I asked.

"It's nothing." Neil pushed the issue aside. "Just an antique that I was going to show you yesterday. But I've come to realize that you wouldn't be interested in it. I was just making sure that it was still safely tucked away in my pocket."

The look on his face told me that he didn't want to speak about it any further so I dropped the subject. If he didn't want to show me, then that was his business and not mine.

Neil turned to me and scooped me up into his arms once again. I clung tightly to his neck. I felt myself becoming drowsy and nodded off as Neil walked on. I had a dream that Neil was holding me, and it felt so good! I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and snuggled my face into his neck. I wanted to remain here forever. Just then Neil lost his footing a little and I woke up. I found that not only was I dreaming that I had snuggled into Neil's neck but I had actually done so!! I was afraid to look at him. Oh, what he must have thought of me!!

*As Neil walked along he felt Christy nodding off in his arms. Another dream come true, but this dream was even better, because it was real! When she snuggled against his neck, his heart thrilled at the closeness of her! Oh! If she would only do this all the time! But she was only dreaming and after the way she cried out for Grantland in her delirium last night she could very well be dreaming about snuggling in his arms, the thought of it made Neil upset and he slipped on the wet ground. *

I once again began to doze off as Neil started down the mountain. I laid my weary head on his strong shoulder and allowed myself to drift off to a dream filled sleep. I dreamed of dancing with David at our wedding and as we were dancing I was suddenly looking at Neil's face as he looked lovingly into my eyes…

I drifted out of that dream and into another, but this time I was in my wedding gown talking to Miss Alice on the mission porch and as Miss Alice left I heard a song start up and I turned my head to see David smiling at me, I smiled back, but as I turned toward him Neil's voice said, "Mrs. MacNeill! May I have the pleasure of this dance?" I shook my head. What was going on here?… 

I rested with my head on Neil's shoulder for a while as I remembered the bizarre dream that I had, had of marrying Neil. Were these all signs of what I was supposed to do? Or was it just my imagination running away with me? I was still so tired that I drifted off to sleep once more. 

I heard someone call "Christy!"

It was strange to be awakened by David's voice while being held in Neil's arms.

"She had a bad night. Had a raging fever which had me worried." Neil commented to David. 

"Thank God you're all right David said as he took me from Neil's arms. Neil looked forlorn. As David turned around and started down the mountain with me in his arms. I gazed over David's shoulder at Neil thinking of all he had revealed to me last night.

For the first time as I looked at David and Neil I saw two equal but different paths available. 

"That was some storm we had wasn't it." Tom McHone tried to make small talk. 

Neil was a confusing man, but he was so passionate to me in his declaration of love. He had cared for me so tenderly all through the night. Even when I called out for David, he had not lost patience with me. He loved me; I knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt. That prayer that I heard him saying last night had changed my whole way of thinking about this incredible man. The Lord had pulled the veil off of my eyes and I could see things about Neil that I had never noticed before. Not only the way he looked, but everything about him, his actions and emotions. I realized things about the past two days that I had not noticed before. As well as seeing things about Neil in the past that I was too blind to notice at the time. There was a new light shining in Neil's eyes and mine as well. I couldn't keep myself from gazing into his eyes. I had longings for Neil that I had never felt before.

"My colleagues in El Pano are probably wondering where I am." Neil commented as he looked at me trying to decipher what was going through my mind. He looked a bit confused, but still somewhat proud and dignified. 

One was straight and familiar, the other the other winding and intricate and clearly less traveled. 

David stumbled and nearly dropped me. Neil raced up to catch me before I would fall to the ground. 

"I have her," David said. 

"As do I." Neil declared with a knowing look on his face. Our eyes met once again but this time Neil's eyes had a look of knowing, determination, pride and maybe somewhat desirous.

As I saw what might become of this situation I slid down out of the arms of both David and Neil. I would walk the rest of the way if it was the last thing I did. A sore ankle was far better than being torn in half! Or having Neil and David tear each other apart.

And suddenly I knew how crucial it was for me to untangle the feelings inside me, not only for my sake but for David and Neil's as well. And at that moment I made my decision… 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	2. Revelation-Ingle's Cove

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The Revelation ~ Ingle's Cove

I leaned on Tom McHone's shoulder as we descended the mountain from Ingles Cove. My ankle hurt when I walked on it, but I wasn't about to have Neil and David fight over me again. Tom was a great help to me. I knew in my heart that Tom understood what was going on and that he recognized why I couldn't leave either man carry me. So he was doing his best to help me instead. Everyone in the group was silent. The only thing that could be heard was the wetness of the underbrush as the four of us trudged along toward the mission. 

As we reached the mission I saw people streaming out the front door. Dozens of people who had sought refuge here during the devastating storm last night. I wondered how many would be back tonight because they no longer had homes to go back to? How many accounts of devastation would we hear about by the end of the day?

I peered over my left shoulder and saw David following behind me. His head bowed sadly, looking dejected. I walked a bit farther and peered over my right shoulder to see Neil walking behind me, confused and forlorn, but with a new sparkle in his eyes. I had made my decision now I had to find a way to let go of the man I was not to marry and to announce to the man that I was to marry, that I would accept his proposal if he were to ask me.

Neil had told me that he loved me and he had come here to ask me to marry him, but I didn't give him a chance to speak last night. I was afraid of what he might say! I had accepted David's proposal, that meant that I had made a commitment to him, how was I to change my mind now? It would break his heart! How could I do that? But if I didn't tell him the truth I would break Neil's heart! I couldn't win this tug of war. But I couldn't play the game anymore either! There was just too much at stake here! My happiness, yes, but more than that the love and lives of two incredible men! I knew what I had to do, but that didn't make the task any easier for me to accomplish!

While David lived here at the mission it would be much easier to find him alone and I could tell him the truth. On the other hand, Neil lived miles away and he had no idea that I had changed my mind since my tirade yesterday! What was I going to do?

There was no more time for thoughts now; we had arrived at the mission house.

Sam Houston came running up to Dr. MacNeill with tears streaming down his face. Neil swung the boy up into his arms. "What's wrong?" Neil asked.

"We ain't' got no place to live no more Doc! Our cabin's done washed clean away! Where we gonna live now Doc?" Sam Houston howled.

"I'll talk things over with your pa. Maybe you can stay at my place until we can get a cabin built for your family again. How does that sound to you?" Neil inquired.

"That'd be right nice ah yah Doc! I'd like that just fine! And remember our promise, no more foolishness anymore! Right Doc?" Sam Houston announced.

"Right Sam Houston!" Neil smiled at the boy in his arms.

I didn't realize that things for everyone else in the cove had gone from bad to worse! I prayed that the Spencer's hadn't suffered any more loss!! I had been so ill last night that I hadn't thought to pray for everyone.

Once we were inside I saw all of the people who were still here! Oh this storm had been so much more than I had ever imagined. The hunting shack in Ingle's Cove had felt so snug and secure, especially when I was ill!! I felt ashamed for being safe and warm when so many calamities were going on just over the next mountain! How could I think now that *my* problems had any weight to them whatsoever in comparison to these poor suffering individuals and families that were strewn throughout the mission house!?!

Neil came up to me and placed his hands on my shoulders, "Christy, I'm going to carry you up to your room. You need a lot of rest to recover fully from that fever last night. I won't allow you to get involved down here before you have a relapse! You don't want to be sick while you're putting the finishing touches on your wedding. You've got a lot of planning left and only a short time to do it. I want you to get well soon." Then he picked me up and carried me up the stairs to my room. There were mats and blankets, quilts and pillows in every area of the mission including my room.

Neil set me down at the side of the bed, I was more tired than I realized. He asked me for my coat, but I was so exhausted I couldn't remove it myself. So Neil helped me. He also removed my boots and tucked me into bed, and then he hung up my coat and checked once more to be sure the fever was gone. Then he said, "Good-bye Christy. I hope you and David have a happy life together." I was so tired I couldn't respond. I forced my eyes open, but by the time I did he was gone…

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	3. At the Mission

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The Revelation ~ At the Mission

I remember nothing of the rest of that day. I awoke the following morning to the sounds of children downstairs. I gingerly arose from my bed, feeling every muscle as I forced them to move! I knew that the weakness was a result of the fever, but that fact didn't make it any easier for me to move! I glanced around my room and noticed that the refugees from the storm that had taken up residence in my room had been here last night and slept, but were now gone already this morning! I wondered how long I had slept.

A knock on my door brought me back to the present. "Come in?"

It was Miss Alice. "Well, I see thee has rejoined us again!" She said. "Thee have nearly slept the clock around! Thee have been asleep for twenty-two hours!"

"I have!!" I was astonished by that fact!

"Neil said we should leave thee sleep as long as thee would like." Miss Alice said.

"I can hardly believe that I could sleep that long! I should be downstairs doing my part to help out!" I announced.

"Thee should stay in bed and get all the rest thee can! Thee do not want to have to postpone thy wedding!" Alice smiled.

"Miss Alice?" I started. "As a matter of fact I do." I paused a few moments. "I've been thinking for awhile now and I'm afraid that David is not the man for me!"

Miss Alice sat on the side of my bed and took my hand. "Christy, I have to apologize to thee. I have been grossly unfair to thee. I have been afraid of losing thee and therefore I have been trying my best to talk thee into marrying David just so that thee would remain here with me at the mission. I have known all along that thee and Neil were meant for each other, but that would mean that thee would be moving away from here, that thee would be confiding in someone other than myself. But *my* fear of losing thee should not interfere with *thy* life or happiness. I am sorry for any pain that I have caused thee."

"I forgive you Miss Alice." I said. "I was attracted to David as well. But it was an attraction that was already beginning to fade before Neil showed up here the day before yesterday. I felt such excitement when you told me that you had received a letter from Neil! It took my breath away! It was a feeling that I didn't understand. I couldn't place my finger on why I was excited. David noticed the change in me right away. But now I know why…it's because I'm in love with Neil!"

"I know thee are Christy. I watched the two of thee as thee said Good-bye to each other three months ago. I should have rushed out the door and confronted the two of thee and made thee come to thy senses-made thee tell each other what thee were feeling, but I did not. I just stood back hoping that Neil would ride off and leave thee. It was not right!" Miss Alice paused for a long period of thought. "Well, I need to go downstairs and help. David and Dr. Ferrand and Ruby Mae cannot handle everything alone. I will see how strong thee are tomorrow and maybe thee can come down and help."

"Where is Neil?" I asked

"I'm afraid he's not here Christy. He telephoned his colleagues in El Pano. Two of the Scientists are going on a head while the third, a Dr. Harold Wade, is working with Dr. Davis from El Pano. There are an awful lot of sick and wounded as a result of the storm! So the three Doctor's are taking different sections of the countryside and checking on wounds and looking for any signs of diseases. There could be another epidemic as a result of this flood! We must pray that there is not!! I am afraid Neil may be gone for weeks! Depending on what he finds."

"After what I saw here when I first arrived, I'm sure I can find enough to keep me busy for a few weeks!" I said. "One of the first things I need to do is to speak to David, and I need to call my mother so she can stop the guests from coming."

"David is busy for a few days. But I do believe thee should call thy mother as soon as possible." Miss Alice agreed. "Would thee like me to help thee downstairs to the telephone?"

"Yes please! I feel I need to tell my mother what has happened as quickly as I can. I don't want people to show up for a wedding that isn't going to be."

So Miss Alice helped me down the stairs to the telephone. She put through the call to my mother while I sat on the stairs. When she had my mother on the line I stood up to speak with her.

"Hello mother?" I said. "We've had a terrible storm here. People have had their homes washed away and they've lost loved one's in the swollen river! There has been a lot of devastation here!" I paused as my mother commented. "We're doing well here at the mission. Yes, David is fine also" I paused. "Mother that's why I've called . . .I'm not sure there is going to be a wedding. As time is passing I'm beginning to realize that I can't spend the rest of my life with David."

Mother said, "Christy dear, if you have any doubts whatsoever then *don't* marry him dear! You don't want to make a mistake that you will regret for the rest of you life! I don't care what's been ordered or what has to be returned, I want you to do what you feel is best for you!"

"Thank-you Mother!" I paused, wondering how to go on. "Mother? I'm not sure how to say this?. . . I'm in love with Neil MacNeill. Dr. MacNeill. He moved to Baltimore three months ago, but he showed up here at the mission the day before yesterday. I can't tell you how my heart leaped for joy when I saw him come in the door! He asked me to take the day off and go with him for a ride up to Ingle's Cove. He said I looked like I had been working too hard and I needed some time off from all of the preparations. He ordered me as my physician to go with him . . . We had a lovely ride and we stopped at the top to walk around and enjoy the view.

"While we were walking we began talking about Jeb Spencer whose wife died of Typhoid and Pneumonia a few months ago. He's still taking his loss hard! Neil said, "It's tragic when a woman takes hold of a man's soul and then leaves him. Simple things like breathing suddenly become more complex. Even work doesn't help. The nights he's laid awake thinking of her . . .Seeing her face every time closes his eyes. Hearing her voice on every breeze . . . hoping he could see her just one more time --so he could tell her how much he loved her -- how he couldn't live another day without her-- I know because it's how I feel about you. I was wrong to leave here without telling you what was in my heart. I'm in love with you -- and I've come back to ask you to marry me." 

"I ran away from him and he followed me. He said 'Running away gets us nowhere.' And I told him "There is no 'us' Doctor". He said he saw how my face lit up when I saw him at the mission and that I was denying that I had the same feelings for him. I told him he wasn't going to ruin what David and I had together. That I was going to marry David. He said 'Even if it's a mistake'! Then the storm hit and our horses ran away. Neil took me to an old hunting shack where we would be out of the weather.

"He tried to prove to me how he felt by kissing me. But I slapped his face and ran out of the shack onto the porch. He begged me to come inside, but I told him he should never have kissed me. He said he wouldn't keep his feelings for me packaged up like a crate of your china and I ran off into the storm! I fell down an embankment and hurt my ankle. Neil found me and carried me back to the shack. I was shivering and I had a high fever. I must have lost consciousness because I suddenly woke up in the bed with Neil holding a wet cloth on my forehead.

"I told him about why it was important for me to come to Cutter Gap and later in the night he was staring pensively into the fire and I asked what he was thinking. He told me about how he happened to go to Scotland to become a Doctor.

"Later I was very sick and I thought I was seeing things as I watched Neil on his knees beside my bed pouring out his heart to the Lord! It was exciting to see!

"Then the next thing I knew it was yesterday morning and I was feeling much better! I saw Neil asleep in the chair and I remembered everything that had happened the night before! He came over to check my temperature and he said this whole ordeal was his fault." I haven't been able to speak to him about that yet. But I intend to talk with him and tell him how much I love him and that if he would indeed ask me to marry him, I would say yes. But he may be gone for weeks now with tending to sick and injured people who got hurt in the flood, there may also be new typhoid cases and only God knows what else because of this storm and flooding!!

"Keep Cutter Gap in your prayers mother, we're going to need all the prayers we can get! It's been an extremely difficult year so far!

"I'll keep you posted on any developments. Thank-you so much mother for understanding! I love you! Good-bye!"

There I had said it. I had to tell David next. Then the pleasure of telling Neil would come after that!

Miss Alice helped me back up the stairs. I fell asleep almost immediately and didn't wake up until the next morning!!

This morning I was starving! I was rested enough now that I wanted to get up and help! I cautiously rose from my bed being mindful of how I felt yesterday and how little I had eaten in three days! But I couldn't stand to be in this bed any longer! I had to get up and do something! Anything!! 

I dressed slowly and carefully. I was slightly dizzy, but after not eating for three days I could expect that! When I was finished I walked slowly down the stairs. I was in time for Breakfast! Thank God!!

"Are thee sure thee should be out of bed?" Miss Alice asked.

"I can't stand to be in bed any longer! I just have to get up and do something! Give me anything to do and I'll do it!!"

"Well, we shall see how thee feels after thee has eaten!" Miss Alice offered.

I ate my Breakfast and also had seconds!! 

I was energized this morning! I just had to do something! So many people were suffering from this disaster; I could no longer idly stand by! I threw myself into the work at the mission. My problems all seemed so petty compared to the desolation that surrounded us on every side.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	4. Condition of the Cove

**__**

The Revelation ~ Condition of the Cove

Neil was to cover the area North of the mission to Raven Mountain, west to Lyleton, South along the Black Hawk River then down along Crumb Hollow West to the Cutter Gap then back North to the mission property again.

He discovered that The Bob Allen's no longer had a home to call their own. The mill was in good condition at least, but they would have to rebuild their cabin. Any possessions that they had inside were gone. 

"Bob, I'll be back to help you rebuild after I've finished my rounds. I'd love to help you now, but there may be someone out there that needs me right now." Neil offered.

"I understand Doc. You've been there for me a for, I can't stand in the way of yah helping someone else out either." Bob said. "We'll get by Doc. We always have."

"I know you have Bob. I just wish there was more I could do!" Neil said.

Will Beck's horse had been washed out from under him during the flooding. Some men had helped him home, but his leg was badly mangled. Neil wasn't sure if he could save it. He set it the best that he could and prayed that God would do the rest. He promised Will that he would be back to check in on him in a few days.

The McHone's hadn't fared as well. Their cabin had been surround by Turkey Trot Creek on three sides. So when the floodwaters came it washed away just about everything. Tom and Opal were mighty grateful that the boys and baby Iris were all safe and sound. They were going to be staying at the mission house until they could rebuild. 

"Tom, I'll do what I can to help you rebuild. Maybe if you offer to help Bob Allen rebuild then he'll come and help you to rebuild as well? I'll help you both out as much as I possibly can!"

Bird's-Eye Taylor's place didn't look too bad. But he wasn't looking for any help from anyone. He told Neil about what had happened to Miss Henderson the night of the storm. Neil hadn't heard that before. Even Alice hadn't mentioned it to him. If he had known that a tree had fallen on Alice he certainly would have examined her for any problems while he was at the mission!

The Matthew Coburn Family was doing nicely; they had built their cabin up on the mountain. Although Matthew had been lost in the storm he had found his way back shortly after the rains ceased. 

No one was home at the Morrison cabin. When they returned they wouldn't find much left. Just about everything had been washed away! Ruby Mae was not going be happy. She may not have lived here much anymore, but this was still her home, until now.

The list could go on and on! But the stories were all about the same. Some people were lucky to escape with their lives; others weren't that lucky. Some had a roof over their heads yet, while others didn't have that luxury anymore. Neil knew how little these people had before and now they had nothing!! He was doing his best to keep his faith in a good God, but it would help tremendously if he had, had someone who was strong in faith to stand beside him and help him along, someone to be a good example to him!

When he arrived back at the mission for a rest he offered to cover the rest of the cove south of the mission. Since that was the direction of his cabin he could swing by his place and see how it was doing. Although the Holcombe's were staying there while they rebuilt and they said everything was still in place. Neil wanted to see for himself. Even though he didn't plan to live there much longer.

Alice saw Neil ride up and went out to greet him. "Well, how is everything in your section Neil?"

"Rough Alice! I'll have to go back and help Bob Allen and Tom McHone rebuild! I don't know if Bob and Mary will be willing to come back here and stay, but they can't all stay in the mill! Is it alright if I extend an offer to them to stay here until they've rebuilt?"

"Of course Neil! That's what this mission is for!" Alice answered. "Have thee noticed any unusual cases that might warrant our closer attention? We need to remain watchful for some time to try to stave off any epidemics!"

"I know Alice, and no I haven't seen any." Neil offered. "Have you heard anything from Dr. Davis or Dr. Wade yet?"

"No we haven't Neil." Alice stated. "Let us hope that in this case, 'no news is good news'!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I started by picking up around the mission, I swept, helped make meals, helped with the never-ending chore of laundry for the first few days. I was regaining strength rapidly. On the fourth day I went to visit the Spencer's.

"Jeb! I'm so glad to see that all of you are all right! Your cabin looks sound also!"

"Thank-you Miz Christy. The bees didn't fare to well, but I guess that's not so bad compared to other folks in the cove. Bees is the least of my worries after everything else that's happened. I've gotta help Tom and Opal rebuild and Bob Allen has tah rebuild! There are plenty of family members that need my help after this here storm! John and me, we've gotta heap a work tah do for others." Jeb stated.

"I know. That's why I've come. I want to help! Where do you think I should start?" I asked.

"I think yah could help at Tom and Opal's best. What with them havin the baby and all. Plus Opal ain't been well since her least'un was born." Jeb commented.

"Thank-you Jeb! I'll ride over there immediately." 

I mounted Buttons and headed for the McHone's place. 

As I rounded the last ridge I stopped Buttons and placed my hand over my mouth as the tears began to flow. The total desolation that I saw before me was more than I could bear! I had to compose myself before I went farther. Viewing the ruins of the McHone property was overwhelming. They had lost everything! Thank the Lord that they had all been safe at the mission when this occurred! 

I rode down the ridge to where I could see Opal sitting and resting. She looked exhausted! 

"Mornin' Miz Christy!" Opal called. 

"Good morning Opal!" I started. "What can I do to help you? Just give me a job and I'll do it!"

"Well, right now all we can do is to pick through what's left and clear the area for the new cabin. That's what we been doin for days!"

"I'll help with that if you want me to!?" I asked.

"Miz Christy! A citified lady like you cain't be a gittin her hands dirty a diggin in no mud!!" Opal said.

"Opal! I'm here to help! Why can't you accept my help?" I cried.

"I don't want you a gittin your store bought clothes dirty because a us!" 

At that I reached down and grabbed two handfuls of mud and spread it all over my skirt, and shirtwaist! "There Opal, now I'm not dirty because of you! I'm dirty because I want to be! Now where do I start working?"

Opal laughed uneasily. "Well, Miz Christy I reckon yah can pick up that thar shovel and start tah diggin. We been diggin kinda slow just incase thar's something under that mud worth ahkeepin. Thar hain't been much. We found a few pans and dishes, but not much a anything else."

So I picked up the shovel and started to dig. The day had started out cool, but the sun was starting to heat things up considerably. I rolled up my sleeves a little, still trying to remain modest. I didn't find anything worth keeping but I was helping to make room for the new cabin. It would be wonderful when Tom and Opal would have a place to stay once again. 

Jeb and John stopped by to see how things were progressing. They told us that Bob and Mary Allen had their land cleared and were asking if everyone could help them starting tomorrow to build their cabin, then they would help everyone else as they were needed to build. Tom, Opal, Uncle Bogg and the other men that were helping all said that they would be there bright and early tomorrow. I said I would be there as well if they thought there was anything that I could do. Jeb said they could use all the help they could get. David was there helping right now also as was Dr. Ferrand. 

When I finished at the McHone's for the day I could hardly wait to return to the mission and take a nice hot bath. I had to speak to David today, some how. If it was the last thing I did. I couldn't leave him going on thinking that everything was still the same between us, when it definitely was not. I knew even before Neil's return that I shouldn't marry David, but something inside of me wanted so badly to be married that I just couldn't allow myself to back out. Now I had seen the error of my ways and I had discovered where my heart truly belonged and it was not with David, but with Neil. 

I unsaddled Buttons and I fed her, I did all of my chores in the barn, then I headed for the house. Before I climbed the stairs I spoke to Ruby Mae and asked her to get a bath ready for me. I removed my muddy boots and placed them by the back door, I was going to need them again tomorrow. I padded up the stairs and got ready for my bath, when Ruby Mae announced that my bath was ready I could have done cartwheels I was so happy! A nice hot bath was just what this tired body needed to rejuvenate itself for the unpleasant task that lie ahead of me . . .

After Dinner David went out to his bunkhouse. I stayed back at the mission for a while to compose myself and to think of exactly how I wanted to approach this. How do you go up to someone and deliberately break his heart? I just couldn't fathom this! But I also knew inside of me that this marriage was not meant to be. Neil's name was written on my heart and I could not spend the rest of my life with the wrong man. It wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to David and it wouldn't be fair to Neil. I knew what I had to do and I had to just place one foot in front of the other until I was at David's bunkhouse. Then trust that the Lord would give me the words to say once I got there.

I left the mission house. I did as I told myself I would; I put one foot in front of the other and headed for David's bunkhouse. He was standing on the porch looking out at the sunset.

"David?" I said softly.

"How can anyone live here and still not believe in God?" David said. I knew he was speaking of Neil, but he didn't know of the prayer that Neil had said at my bedside just a few days ago. "What's scary is the things we take for granted." He paused as he looked down at the ground. "I've lost you haven't I?"

"I'm so sorry David." I said with tears in my eyes. 

"Well, I don't know that I ever really had you." David said sadly.

"I've been so unfair to you . . .To me . . .To everyone." I wanted to say Neil, but I didn't want to hurt him any more than was necessary. I started to cry softly.

"All I wanted was for you to love me." David smiled sweetly at me. "You opened my heart in a way that I thought was never possible and I will always love you for that Christy Huddleston." 

I cried softly.

Then I slowly removed David's ring and handed it back to him. He looked down at it. I felt awful for him. I hated to break his heart like this. Then I gave him a friendly hug as I cried softly. I didn't know any other way to let him know how very sorry I was for breaking his heart. Yet I didn't want to make him think that I was sorry for the decision that I had finally made.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

With that objectionable task behind me I returned to my room. I cried a while longer, but then I began to wonder how on earth I was ever going to accomplish the next step . . .that of telling Neil that I was in love with him. That I wanted more than anything to be his wife!

But first there was so much work that needed to be done in the cove!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	5. In the Cove

**__**

The Revelation ~ In the Cove

The following day I arrived bright and early at the Allen's. I once again agonized over the sight I saw before me. These people had so little before the storm and now they had even less! I know I had given Neil a long sermon on God being a good God, but how could I ever convince him or anyone else of that after they'd witnessed the desolation all through out the cove? I could do very little, but I was willing to do whatever they gave me to do.

I rode up to the Allen's; I saw Bob and Mary, Little Burl, Creed, and all the others. They could have used Rob's help right now, but he was away at college.

I dismounted Buttons and tethered her to a small tree. I took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. I threw my shoulder's back and forged ahead. I turned toward Mary. I didn't want to smile; I just looked at her forlorn face. I had brought supplies from the mission, mostly food, potatoes, onions, carrots, tomatoes, beans, corn, etc. I thought we could use them in a stew for the men, if Mary and Bob wanted.

"Morning Miz Christy." Mary said sadly.

"Good morning Mary." I answered. "I've come to help out in any way that I can. I'll do anything you want me to." I handed Mary the sack of food. "Miss Alice sent these vegetables. We thought maybe we could use them for the meal today if you don't mind?"

"I'm sure we could use them. Thank-you." Mary said sadly. I knew how difficult it must have been for her to accept my help; they didn't take to accepting charity. But what else would they have to feed the men that would come here to help today?

"What can I do?" I asked.

"We'll divide up the work once everyone gets here, but I'll most likely need yah to help with the meal fixin. I'll need all the help I can get with that. I'm sure most everyone coming today will be men. I'm kind a glad to see a woman show up!" Mary said shyly.

"Then I'm very glad I came today!" I declared. 

Men came from all over the cove and all the neighboring areas. Even the Holcombe's who I thought were building their cabin today as well. I asked Mary about this. She said they had made a pact with the Holcombe's that if the Holcombe's came to help today, the Allen's would help them with their cabin tomorrow.

I was busy peeling vegetables, chopping vegetables, and cutting up meat into a huge iron pot. This would be the largest stew I had ever made. But as more and more men came pouring in to help, I realized we would need all this and more. Mary made pan after pan of cornbread over the open fire.

I stood to stretch and rest my back from constantly bending over the table. That's when I saw him . . .Neil was here! He was working along side the other men helping to build the cabin. I stared at him, as I had never done before. Today I was seeing him in a different light. He looked different than the last time I had seen him in his suit and tie. Today he was working up a sweat with his hair most unruly in the heat and humidity. I wanted to talk with him, but this was neither the time nor the place. I hadn't seen him in over a week and a half. So much had happened since then, I had seen so much devastation that it was hard to focus on anything else. Yet seeing Neil there, I just couldn't help but think of everything he had said to me twelve days ago. I ached to tell him of my feelings but I couldn't, at least not yet. Maybe after all of the cabins were built. Suddenly he turned and looked at me, our eyes locked for a brief moment a look of sadness swept across his face and he shook his head and turned away hastily. He had no smile, not even an acknowledgement of me. But with all he'd probably seen these past twelve days I could imagine that seeing me was the least of his worries.

I went back to my meal preparations. This was what I had come here to do. I hadn't come to speak to Neil. Of course I didn't know he'd be here.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

At Noon the men streamed over for their food, some were lying on the ground in the shade trying to catch a catnap before starting up again. I took the water bucket around to everyone offering each man a drink. To those that didn't come for food I offered to get them a plate if they wanted. Some accepted my hospitality others refused it. I had kept an eye on Neil and I was saving 'the-best-for-last' as they say. When I turned to him, he looked sound asleep in the shadow of a tree. I wasn't sure weather to wake him or not. He had worked just as hard, if not harder than the other men today and if I knew Neil MacNeill, he probably had been helping out everyone in the cove day and night these past twelve days and he hadn't gotten much sleep. I'm sure he had probably gotten even less to eat! I walked up to him trying to make as much noise as I could so he would hear me if he were awake. He didn't stir . . . There went my plans for speaking to him at noon!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

By the end of the day the Allen's had a shanty-type cabin built. It would protect them from the weather and they could add to it, or build on as needed, as time went by. But at least for now they had a place to live. It was agreed that tomorrow, work would be done at the Holcombe's.

I saw Neil readying to leave. I hoped he would wait so we could talk. I headed over to where he had saddled Duke and was mounting him. He noticed me coming and quickly turned Duke and took off as fast as he could.

I stood there staring after him. 'What on earth is going on?' I asked myself.

I went back and helped Mary clean up. As the sun was setting I apologized for not finishing the work, but I had to leave so I could get back to the mission before dark.

I couldn't get Neil off of my mind. Why had he acted the way he had today? Well, maybe I did. He still thought David and I were getting married this week. There seemed to be no way that he would allow me to speak with him either. I knew he was hurt. From experience I had seen it with my own eyes that when he was hurt he sought solitude. He had locked himself away many times. I had found him a few times sitting on a bench by the river staring pensively out at the water. I had no idea what to do in this situation. Usually he withdrew completely, even from me. This time he was totally avoiding me.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Once again I asked Ruby Mae to get my bath ready. I was praying that God would give me the answers to my questions about Neil! The Lord had shown me where he wanted me to go, but now I needed him to help me show Neil!

I ate light for Supper; I was too tired to eat. As soon as my sandwich was eaten I went directly to my room. I fell asleep almost immediately. Tomorrow I had to be up bright and early, as the Holcombe's would need help tomorrow.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Neil went home and plunged into the river. Taking off his clothes only after he got into the water. He soaked his tired body and weary muscles. The water was cool and refreshing after the heat and humidity of the day. 

As he lie back to relax his mind began to wonder again! Just like he had told her . . .he saw her face again as he closed his eyes! He soaked his head under the flowing water trying to drown out the vision of loveliness that he knew would never be his! He rose up shaking his head. He turned around quickly as he thought he heard her calling him from behind. But she wasn't there. Even the coldness of the stream was not enough today!! He ran into the house grabbing his towel as he went by. He ran to his bedroom and threw himself into the bed. "God, why can't I just forget her!? Please remove these thoughts of her from my mind--forever! She belongs to Grantland, I thought when she looked at me that day coming back from Ingle's Cove that she had changed her mind, but I have heard nothing of any changes in her plans. So, once again, I was wrong. Please remove these thoughts of her from my mind!! I can't take it anymore!" He rolled over in his bed. As he sighed a deep mournful sigh, said "Oh Christy!!" Exhaustion then took its toll and he fell into a fitful sleep!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

As I ascended the stairs the next morning I saw no Alice, no Ruby Mae, no David, but there was a strange, well-dressed, man sitting at the Dining Table. 

I approached the table and extended my hand. "Hello! My name is Christy Huddleston, I don't believe we've met."

The man rose from his place at the table and took my hand. "Wade, Harold Wade, Miss Huddleston."

"Oh yes! You're the Doctor that's helping out Dr. Davis and Dr. MacNeill!"

"Yes I am." Dr. Wade replied. "I've heard so many wonderful things about you from Dr. MacNeill! You're all he talks about! He is very much in love with you Miss Huddleston!"

"I know . . .now, Dr. Wade." I started. "I'm afraid when he first told me I was quite surprised, although I suppose I shouldn't have been. I turned him down, but now I want to tell him that I changed my mind but he won't even speak to me!"

"If I see him, I'll let him know that you would like to speak to him privately. I may even let him know that I know he wants to hear what you have to say!"

"I would appreciate that Dr. Wade." I said.

"I'm being selfish, Miss Huddleston. You see, the way Neil is right now, he's not much good to us in our research. I wager if we can get him married to you, maybe he won't be so obsessed with you and he can actually concentrate on his research again!" Dr. Wade smiled with a chuckle. 

"I'll do my best." I said. "I'm afraid I have to go. I'm supposed to help the Holcombe's today. They have to rebuild as well. It was nice meeting you and a pleasure speaking with you Dr. Wade. I do appreciate your help, even if it is a bit selfish!" I giggled softly.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I saddled Buttons and headed for the Holcombe's. I was afraid I would be late. I hadn't expected to speak to Dr. Wade this morning.

The men had made quite a lot of progress already this morning. I approached Elizabeth Holcombe. "I'm sorry I'm late! Everyone else at the mission was gone and we had a guest. I had to make him feel welcome before I left. "I'm very sorry!"

"It's alright Miz Christy! I understand. There's still plenty left for us to do! Why don't you start by takin the water bucket out to the men for me?" She asked. 

"I'd be happy to Elizabeth." I said as I picked up the bucket and walked toward the men. The first man I approached was Jeb Spencer. "Good morning Jeb!"

"Mornin' Miz Christy!" Jeb said as he took a drink and proceeded to pour another over his head.

I made my rounds to everyone. I wondered if Neil would even accept a drink from me after the way he acted toward me yesterday. My heart pounded in my ears. I know I was breathing heavier. I was afraid of what he might say. I also noticed the way he looked with his shirt open, suspenders hanging down and sleeves rolled up. He was dripping wet from all of the heat and humidity again today. I looked at his bare chest, but I shook my head and glanced away. I looked back as I offered him the pail of water. I tried to keep my eyes locked on his face, but I kept being drawn to his chest! I know he noticed because of the look on his face. He took a drink a dipper of water and poured another over his head.

This time it was I that spun around quickly and scurried back to where I was working.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

*Neil watched after Christy as she hurried away without speaking to him. 'Why can't she see that she's attracted to me?' 'Why can't she admit that she loves me too?' He tried unsuccessfully once again to shake the thoughts of her from his mind. He had to find something that would fill the void left by her leaving!! Maybe when he went back to Baltimore he'd take some of the Doctor's up on their offer to go with them on a blind date, but no one would compare to the beauty before him right now! All he could think of was drawing Christy into his arms and kissing her!*

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

By the end of the day the Holcombe's also had a roof over their heads. Crude though it maybe, it was much more then they had this morning.

I watched Neil as he hastily retreated again today. I would once again see him tomorrow at the McHone's. After that I had no idea what his plans were.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I once again went home and took a bath. I tried to soak my head under the water to erase the vision of Neil at the Holcombe's!! Why had I been so attracted to him? It just wasn't right! I had to get rid of this idea, this feeling . . . This *desire*, once and for all!! I had to find a way to speak to Neil tomorrow if it was the last thing I did!! Maybe I could ask him to go for a walk at noon or something! I had no idea what, but I had to seize *any* opportunity that presented itself tomorrow!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

*Neil went home and proceeded to do the same as yesterday! But this time he was haunted by the vision of her looking at him the way she did with desire in her eyes! He could see the longing and the yearning on her face! Couldn't she feel it inside herself? He knew the love in her eyes, but she wouldn't admit it!! Why? 'The water is just too warm for my purposes today!' Neil thought out loud to himself.

He threw himself into bed again tonight he thought of all the lonely days and especially the lonely nights ahead because the day after tomorrow Christy would be getting married-to Grantland!!'*

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

In the early morning hours a knock came at the door. Someone was yelling 'Doc MacNeill!!" "Doc MacNeill!!" Neil pulled on his trousers and headed for the door. It was Mr. Beck, Will's father. "It's Will Doc, he looks real bad, and I think its gangrene set in his leg he busted."

"I'll be right out! Saddle my horse for me!" Neil raced to his room and got dress. He grabbed his saddlebags as he stormed out the door.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I slept fitfully. I kept dreaming of Neil the way I saw him yesterday! Why this kept haunting me I didn't understand, but I would one day. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

When I arrived at the McHone's, Opal was talking to Mrs. Beck. I stood back until their private conversation was over.

"Miz Christy! Mrs. Beck was a tellen me they had tah fetch Doc MacNeill last night. Will's leg didn't heal up the way it shoulda. Gangrene set in. The Doc had tah remove his leg. Seems Doc is stayin' there tah make sure everything's all right. We best keep ah prayin' for Will!"

"Yes, we should!" I said. "Poor Will!"

There went my plans for today! How would I even get to speak to Neil! By the time I was done here I knew that it would be too late to head for the Beck's, and Neil might not even be there when I got there.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	6. Confronting Neil

**__**

The Revelation ~ Confronting Neil

It was a long ride home that night! I wanted things to be so much different then they had turned out to be. I was so glad that Opal, Tom, Izaak, Vincent, Toot and Iris had a place to stay, but I had so hoped to get a chance to tell Neil how I felt today! I was prepared. I knew exactly what I wanted to say to him. But now I was left just 'thinking' about my plans again.

As I lay in my bed that night I realized that tomorrow would have been David's and my wedding if all had gone as planned. But I was eternally grateful that Neil had come to confess his love for me.

Exhaustion took over tonight and I slept sound. I awoke early. I got dressed and went out to the barn. I saddled Buttons. If I couldn't speak to Neil any other way I'd head out to his cabin and meet him head-on!

When I saw Neil's cabin in the distance my heart leaped for joy! I tethered Buttons on the rail outside. I knocked on the door. There was no answer. I tried the door, it opened easily. I called Neil but there was no answer. I looked around the cabin, it looked deserted. I knew I shouldn't, but I went into Neil's bedroom. All of his clothes were gone! I heard a horse outside and I looked out the window and noticed Neil coming out of the barn! I raced down the stairs as I heard him riding away. I ran outside to see him riding down the road! I ran to the center of the road calling his name. He paused and looked back as he did three months ago. I yelled, "I need to talk to you Neil!" 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

As he trotted down the road Neil thought he had heard Christy calling his name. He hated to turn around! So often lately he had thought he heard her calling, but turned to find no one there! But he couldn't resist. This time Christy was standing in the road looking at him. His heart thrilled, but sank suddenly as he remembered that today was her wedding day. She had probably come to say good-bye! He couldn't handle that right now! He also had his train ticket to Baltimore and he had just enough time to make his connection in El Pano. 

He shook his head. "All I want is for you to be happy Mrs. Grantland." Neil called. As difficult as it was, he turned Duke around and headed off down the road leaving the woman he dearly loved standing in the road staring after him. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

He road quickly away I had no time to mount Buttons and catch up to him! I ran down the road away and called, "I love you Neil!" But he kept on riding.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

He had hoped after his confession that they would be traveling back to Baltimore together. But that was not to be. He silently hoped that by the time he was finished with his research in Baltimore that the Grantland's would have moved on from Cutter Gap to a church, or another mission. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I felt stunned! Rejected! Confused. What was he doing? He had called me 'Mrs. Grantland'. Of course he thought today was our wedding, that by tonight I would be Mrs. Grantland. How could I let him know that I had no intention of doing that! I wanted to become Mrs. *MacNeill*!!

I mounted Buttons and headed off down the road. As I cantered down the road I pondered going to El Pano to catch the train before it left. It was worth a try. I headed toward El Pano!

The way my luck had been running lately did not change today! I reached El Pano as the train was leaving! I dismounted Buttons to give her a rest. I walked to Mrs. Tatum's Boarding house. I thought I would be allowed to rest on the porch for a while and gather my thoughts. I tethered Buttons out front. I sat in a wicker rocker on the porch. My mind was racing a thousand miles an hour! I had to stop it so I could think clearly! I put my head in my hands. I felt tears sting my eyes! Maybe a good cry would clear my head, it often did. I was alone out here except for Buttons, so I allowed myself a good cleansing cry!

I was soon startled by a man's voice speaking to me. I looked up to see Dr. Wade. "I'm sorry!" I sniffed. "What did you say?" As I tried to dry the tears on my face.

"I asked if everything was alright?" Dr. Wade repeated. 

"Actually, no, it's not! Neil won't give me a chance to talk. Although I don't blame him for feeling as he does. Today is the day I was to marry Rev. Grantland. But I called it off. Neil doesn't know that I did, apparently. He left just now on the train, for Baltimore."

"I know. I'm taking the next train back myself. Dr. Davis can handle things from here . . . Is there anything I can do for you?"

"I don't know what can be done! He's gone now for maybe two years!!"

"I'm sorry Miss Huddleston. I know how Neil feels about you, but he's also very insecure where you're concerned. So I'm sure that's why he left without speaking to you today. To be totally honest with you, Neil had a ticket on the train for this afternoon and I was supposed to leave this morning, but he begged me to trade with him, because he said he wanted to be as far away from here as he could possibly go by this afternoon! When he was sure your wedding would be taking place. I don't know how much information you wanted me to give him, so I kept quiet. I hope that's all right? I told him you wanted to speak to him, and that he wanted to hear what you had to say, but he would have nothing to do with it."

"I didn't want you to say anything more. That's fine Dr. Wade. I want to tell Neil in my own way. I'll just have to find a way to speak to him face to face! That's the difficult part!" I said with a sigh. "I need to get back to the Mission. Thank-you for telling me what is going on."

"You're welcome. Good luck in speaking to Neil! Here is my address and where you can reach me. If I can do anything to help you, please tell me." Dr. Wade added.

"Thank-you! I appreciate this!" I said. "Good-bye, Dr. Wade." I mounted Buttons and prepared to leave.

"Good-bye Miss Huddleston."

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Neil sat back in the train seat. He put his head back and closed his eyes. It was no use! Everything he told Christy at Ingle's Cove was true! Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her face!! It wasn't getting better! He had placed their lives in God's hands and God had brought her back. But for David Grantland and not Neil MacNeill!! How long would it be before he would clear his mind of Christy? How could he go on picturing another man's wife in his mind all the time? It wasn't right! He desperately prayed that God would clear his mind of all thoughts of Christy! Christy Grantland . . .

The tears stung his eyes as he thought about what day today was! He no longer wanted to hear her call his name on every breeze or see her face every time he closed his eyes!!! These thoughts had to end soon!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I laid down that night but I was anything but tired! I got back up and paced the floor. I walked on the balcony. I wanted to take a walk by the river, but I knew it was too dangerous especially at night. 

I got on my knees and prayed for the answer. 

Two weeks went by and no one had heard a word from Neil. Finally I couldn't stand it any longer and I called Dr. Wade.

"Hello!"

"Hello Dr. Wade? This is Christy Huddleston." I paused.

"Yes, Miss Huddleston. What can I do for you?"

"First of all, how is Neil? No one has heard anything from him and we're worried about him."

"He's downhearted. He doesn't say much of anything to anyone. He's been working late into the night. He's the first one at work in the morning. Some days I have my doubts as to whether of not he even went home. I've only known him for a short time. Does he always shut himself off from everyone when he's hurting?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so. I hope when we're married I'll be able to change that a little, if not completely!" 

"I think it would do him a world of good to have you come for a visit and tell him what you have to say to him. He needs to know that you love him. He needs to hear that more than anything else right now."

"I could come this week. As soon as possible, but I don't know where to meet him?"

"I'll speak to the Landlord in his apartment building. I'll tell him you're coming from out of town and you may need to get into Dr. MacNeill's apartment when he's at work. Let me know what day you will be arriving. I'll do my best to get Neil out of the laboratory on time! Maybe I'll tell everyone else what's going on that day, if you don't mind? Then we'll all work together to shoo him out of the building as early as possible."

"Tell whom ever you'd like. Just as long as no one shows up at Neil's apartment to see who I am, or how things are going!"

"I'll do my best to dissuade them from doing any of that!" 

"Thank-you Dr. Wade. I'll ride to El Pano tomorrow to get my ticket. I'll call you and let you know which date I will be arriving."

"Then I'll speak with you tomorrow, Miss Huddleston."

"Good-bye Dr. Wade."

Well, at least I had the beginning of a plan!! Tomorrow I would find out the date!

Once again I couldn't sleep well. I dozed occasionally. But not a sound sleep at all. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Neil stayed most nights at the hospital. He had brought most of his clothes here and changed here everyday to make it look as if he had gone home . . .

'Home'? What was that? Where was it? He didn't have a home anymore! He could never go back to Cutter Gap! How could he live that close to Christy *and her husband*? That would be expecting too much!! But yet, his apartment here wasn't his home either. He had picked it out, because he thought it would make a nice little apartment for just Christy and himself while he was here conducting his research. But living there alone was not what he had planned! 

He pictured her face as they descended the mountain that day, how she had looked back at him with longing. He had been so sure that she would change her mind, but that hadn't happened.

Now he was left with no hopes or dreams, no home . . . Where did he belong? Where was he to go from here? Maybe he should move far away and begin a new life somewhere else, but the only other place that felt like home was Scotland! 

He had made a commitment to the Typhoid Research here so this would have to come first! Although thinking of face another year or more in this miserable existence did not sound the least bit appealing!! 

Maybe with time the visions of Christy would end. He prayed continually that they would . . .and *soon*!! He couldn't stand much more of it! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I traveled to El Pano the following day and bought my train ticket. I would be arriving in Baltimore on Wednesday at 7:00 A.M.!! I would probably get to Neil's apartment before he left for work! That would pose a whole new problem. Should I approach him immediately or should I wait until he gets home that evening? Nothing was going to go easily, I could see that, it hadn't so far!! But I loved Neil too much to allow anything get in the way of my telling him that and letting him know that I wanted to marry him. 

In the evening I called Dr. Wade to tell him when I would be arriving and which day I would be there. He said it would be difficult to keep from telling Neil that I was coming, but he promised to keep it a secret! 

Tuesday I would be on the train for Baltimore! Facing Neil in his apartment would make it very difficult for him to ignore me or to run away from me! It was the only chance I had left! I prayed that this plan would work! PLEASE GOD!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	7. Neil's Apartment

**__**

The Revelation ~ Neil's Apartment

Neil strode down the hall to his apartment door. He was angry. "Why was everyone so anxious to get me out of the laboratory today? They said I looked awful and I needed to rest! They just don't understand! I'll not get any rest as long as I'm here! When I sleep in the lab it's the only time that I don't think about her! When I'm here all I can think about is my plans to bring her back here last month as my bride! I can't go in there!" 

Neil paused outside his apartment door. He tilted his head to the side and listened. Was that music coming from his apartment? He shook his head. It couldn't be! He lived here alone and he couldn't have left his Victrola on because it wouldn't still be playing. Besides he hadn't been here in days! It must be the apartment next door. He sniffed the air . . .'That smells delicious'! The neighbors must be having guests this evening.' But that sound and smell seemed to be coming from his apartment. He placed his ear on the door . . .the sound was definitely coming from his apartment. His eyes widened . . .He hadn't felt this shocked since Sam Houston and the Allen boys painted 'REPENT' on his front door and filled his front room with frogs! Only then he had a pretty good idea who had been behind that foolishness…Sam Houston couldn't possibly be here!

Neil stood back and stared at the door for a few moments. Should he go in or shouldn't he? This was his apartment after all and he wanted to know what was going on! If there was someone in there then they were uninvited! Although the thought of having someone to talk to this evening did sound appealing!

Neil slipped the key into the lock and turned it slowly. He wanted to catch whoever it was in his apartment. He ever so slowly and carefully opened the door. He cautiously stepped inside, wishing he had removed his riding boots before he tried to be sneaky! He viewed the Dining table all set with a tablecloth, flowers, candles, and two place settings!?!

This mystery was becoming more and more intriguing! But who could it be? His heart thrilled at the thought of Christy being here, but that couldn't be; her wedding date had past weeks ago. They would even be back from their honeymoon by now!

Neil hoped whomever it was would leave the food behind! It smelled superb. He hated to take the time out to prepare a full meal. It would be wonderful to have a real home-cooked meal once again!!

He glanced into the Parlor, his heart skipped a beat and he lost his breath. He threw himself back against the wall. It couldn't be? What was she doing here? Where was her husband? Why was Christy here? It had to be some kind of good-will gesture or something, but why the table with the candles and only two place settings? There was only one way to find out…So he forged ahead.

He turned the corner and entered the Parlor, "Christy?"

I spun around to see a rather puzzled looking Neil MacNeill looking back at me. 

"Hello Neil." I said softly, not sure how he was going to react to my being here.

He breathed a deep sigh and stared down at the floor as he twisted his riding gloves in his hands.

I turned and looked out the window I had planned what I was going to say. "I've come here because there is something that I have to tell you and for the life of me, you wouldn't give me a chance to say it back home, so I've come here to say it. All I ask is that you hear me out before you say anything. Is that agreed?" I asked.

"Agreed." Said Neil softly.

I took a deep breath and forged ahead. I knew these words would be familiar to Neil, but there were none better to convey my feelings accurately. "It's tragic when a man takes over a woman's soul and just leaves her. Simple things like breathing suddenly become more complex. Even work doesn't help. The nights she's laid awake thinking of him…Seeing his face every time she closes her eyes. Hearing his voice on every breeze…and hoping she could just see him one more time…so she could tell him how much she loved him…how she couldn't live another day without him-I know because it's how I feel about you." As I spoke I could hear Neil's riding boots as he walked ever so slowly across the floor toward me, they were getting closer, and closer, my heart beat faster with each step he took. But I went on. "I was trying to tell you how I felt about you before you left, but you wouldn't let me." I paused as I took at deep breath, preparing to say the rest. "I love you Neil and if you were to ask me to marry you like you said you had come back for, I'd say yes."

I could feel him standing behind me. He was so close I could hear him breathing. I could feel his chest against my back with each breath he took. He was breathing heavily.

"You don't understand Christy. The storm was entirely my fault! If I hadn't returned to tell you how much I loved you that storm would never have happened. God was angry with me. I know because the thunder started just as I declared my love for you!!"

"Neil! If anyone was at fault it was I! I'm the one that was trying to marry the wrong man! I wasn't listening to what God was telling *me*! He was mad at *me*, not you! Neil, you were telling me what was in your heart. I was denying what was in my heart and trying to follow my head! I loved David, but I'm *in love* with you! You're name is written on my heart, as Fairlight used to say. It's you I need…what I said before is true. I can't sleep at night because I'm thinking of you. I see your face every time I close my eyes…I hear your voice on every breeze. I know these were your words, but there are no words that can express how I feel about you any better then these! I had to come here to tell you how I feel! I had to see you one more time so I could tell you how much I love you! How I can't live another day without you!" I could feel him breathing harder, as was I. I stood very still waiting for Neil to react.

He moved still closer and I could feel his body firmly against mine. He was so close I could feel his heart beating and his breath was right next to my ear. His closeness made me shiver. He reached up and drew my hair away from my face and off my shoulder. I sighed a deep quivering sigh. I wanted to turn and look at Neil, but I wasn't sure if I should.

Neil took my chin in his hand and turned my face to look at him. I had a questioning look on my face and I found him to have a loving smile on his face. "Then you aren't married?"

I shook my head. "You never asked me. You just told me that you had come back to ask me, but you never actually did." I paused. "I couldn't make a mistake that I would regret for the rest of my life! I need you!" I reached up my hand to touch his cheek. I heard his breath catch when I touched him. I turned around ever so slowly still holding my hand on his cheek. As I turned Neil wrapped his arms around me and held me close. 

"Just so I don't get slapped again…Christy, may I kiss you?" Neil asked softly.

"I'm so sorry I slapped you that night. I promise I'll never do that to you ever again! You just made me face something that I was afraid to face. I couldn't face your love until I saw you on your knees in prayer at my bedside. Then I knew I could follow my heart…to you!"

"So what is your answer to my question?" Neil whispered.

"Yes please!" I pleaded softly, barely audible.

Neil looked into my eyes as he ran his fingers, feather-soft across my lips, I sighed deeply at his touch as he claimed my lips with his own. I moaned softly as did Neil. As he kissed me, he softly placed his hand on my cheek and stroked it tenderly with his thumb. I sighed softly.

When he stepped back he smiled lovingly at me. I took his face in both my hands.

"I love you Neil!" I whispered.

"I love you Christy!" He replied softly.

Neil drew me into him and held me close.

"Oh Neil I feel like I've finally come home." I sighed

"Really Christy?" Neil inquired.

I nodded, whispering. "Absolutely!" 

Neil hugged me firmly. "Thank-you Christy! That means so much to me!" 

Just then his stomach rumbled. I looked at him with a shy smile on my face. He had an embarrassed smile and his cheeks were a bit rosy.

"I'm sorry to break the mood Christy, but that meal you made is calling to me! I haven't had a good home-cooked meal in a very long time!" 

"Well then," I said, taking Neil's hands and leading him to the table. "You sit down here and I'll serve the meal." 

I went back into the kitchen and readied everything. I carried out the first course.

When I entered the dining room, Neil had lit the candles, reset the Victrola and he had a fire built in the fireplace.

"That looks delicious!" Neil said.

"I'm glad you like it. I hope you like it even after you've eaten!" I teased.

"I'm sure I will!" Neil said as he took my hand and kissed it softly. "Thank-you for coming here today. It has meant the world to me! Probably more than you will ever know."

"It has been my pleasure, Doctor! I'm extremely glad I came!" I exclaimed.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I cleared the dishes from the table after we were finished with our meal. "That was a fabulous meal Miss Huddleston!" Neil announced as he rose from his chair. He went over and changed the song on the Victrola. I carried the last of the dishes into the kitchen and started to wash them.

Neil came into the kitchen and reached into the water and took my hand. "Come dance with me Christy!" He slipped his other arm around my waist and whispered softly into my ear, "I want to hold you in my arms." He kissed me tenderly.

"But I don't want to leave all this work for you! Why don't you help me first and we can dance later?" I offered.

"Hmm?" Neil looked thoughtfully at me. "Do I feel like drying dishes?"

I tried to give him a pitiful look, like a small child trying to get her way.

Neil looked at me and smiled broadly. "You won't get me that way Christy!" He laughed.

"Please Neil!?!" I begged. "If *we* don't do them now, then *you* will have to do them later *alone*!"

"Alright! I'll help!" Neil conceded.

"Thank-you!" I said as I turned toward him and kissed him tenderly, which seemed to surprise him. 

"So you saw me praying did you?" Neil asked. "I thought your fever was so high that you didn't know what was going on around you."

"I opened my eyes long enough to see you. I could hear you crying and I wanted to reach out to you, but I couldn't. I was thrilled to witness your prayer though. Thank-you! I don't know what would have happened to me if you hadn't." I said. "I'm so very glad you did Neil! I can't tell you how much it means to me! So do you feel any different?"

"Let's just say I'm have a lot more conversations with God now." Neil answered.

"I'm glad Doctor!" I added with a smile.

"How are things back home?" Neil asked.

"Everything is moving along slowly. Sam Houston misses you terribly! He talks about you all the time! He's still worried about you being a heathen. He wants you to go to heaven so badly! Is it alright if I tell him about your prayer?"

"Yes, I suppose you could tell him about it." Neil answered.

"The entire Holcombe family is settling into their new cabin nicely as are the Allen's and the McHone's. Jeb is doing extremely well! He learned a lot staying home by himself during the storm and sending his children off to the mission with Opal alone! He was very sorry for what he had done and leaving them like that. I'm glad to see more of the old Jeb back again!

"I thank God that disease was at a minimum!" I went on. "After the Typhoid epidemic I prayed that there would be no other epidemic. I've heard of all sorts of diseases breaking out after floods!"

"Aye! Diseases settle in the soil and when a flood churns it up then you can have cases of diseases that you haven't heard of in ages!" Neil stated.

"How is your research going?" I asked.

"Slowly. We're testing different theories. It's a long drawn out process, research is, but the benefits far out weigh the time it takes!

"I'm curious Christy. How did you get in here? Not that I'm not glad to see you here, I am! I'd just like to know."

"When you were in the cove helping with the rebuilding projects and such. I met your friend Dr. Wade one day at the mission. I had lost all hope of ever getting a chance to speak to you privately. So I confided in him. When even he couldn't help me in the cove we came up with this plan. He spoke to your landlord and told him what was going on and what day I would be here. I got here this morning. Your landlord let me in. I cleaned, I went shopping, and I cooked!! I didn't know exactly what time you would be home, so I finished cooking and waited!" I told him.

"I can't tell you how much your coming here has meant to me, Christy!" Neil said as he moved closer to me. "Thank-you again!"

I finished the last of the dishes and I turned to Neil taking a dish and the towel from his hands and setting them aside I said, "Why don't we just leave the rest! I think we both would rather dance now!" I whispered with my face only inches from his. I gazed into his eyes. He took me by the hand and led me over to his Victrola and he reset it again. 

"May I have the pleasure of this dance?" Neil asked.

"I would be delighted Dr. MacNeill!!" I answered.

He took my hand and placed it on his shoulder, then he took my other hand in his and we started to dance. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	8. Neil's Proposal

**__**

The Revelation ~ Neil's Proposal

We danced to one song after another until Neil took my hand and led me to the settee in front of the fireplace. He asked me to sit down.

Walking over to the mantle. He opened up a wooden box and removed a cloth bag from inside and replaced the cover on the box. With his back turned to me he opened the bag and removed something from inside. He set the empty bag down on the mantle; it looked very similar to the bag that contained the antique that he was carrying in his pocket in Ingle's Cove. The one he said I wouldn't be interested in. He slowly turned and smiled at me with a twinkle in his eye, a twinkle I had not seen in quite some time! He took my left hand and he knelt down before me.

My heart beat faster as I realized what Neil intended to do. My heart was pounding so hard I could scarcely breathe! I'm sure Neil could see it! Or at least hear it!

"Christy, lass. I love you! I can't live another day without you! I don't want to lie awake at night only thinking about you. I don't want to just see your face when I close my eyes, I want to see it in front of me when I open my eyes as well. I've gotten my wish to see you one more time so that I can tell you how much I love, but I have to know, Christy, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

I felt tears of joy stinging my eyes as he slipped a beautiful ring onto my finger! He looked up into my eyes with a serious expression on his face; he was waiting for my answer. I was so excited I was trembling. I started by nodding my head and a broad smile spread across Neil's face. I threw my arms around his neck as I said, "Yes, Neil MacNeill I would love to be your wife!"

Neil pulled back from me and placed his big strong hand on the side of my face. "Thank-you!!" He whispered softly as he proceeded to kiss me tenderly.

"Thank-you for helping me to see things I was blinded to, Neil. I have always had a special place in my heart just for you! It started out as friendship, but it has blossomed into true love. I want to marry my best friend. I want to spend the rest of my life with him . . . With *you*" I declared.

"I love you Christy!" Neil whispered as he kissed me more ardently this time. It left us both breathless.

"I love you too Neil!" I said barely above a whisper.

"Would you dance with me one more time?" Neil asked.

"I'd love too Neil!" I answered softly.

Neil put another song on his Victrola and as the sweet, soft music began to play Neil turned toward me and extended his hand to me. I gratefully accepted. This time Neil folded me into his arms lovingly and I wrapped my arms around his neck as he began to sway slowly to the rhythm of the music. We danced face to face our eyes gazing into each other's with love. The music was almost hypnotic, or was that Neil's eyes? Either way I felt as though I were floating on a cloud. The only thing I could see was Neil's face. The only thing I could hear was the enchanting music. I had never felt like this before! Nothing else existed; no one else mattered at that moment. And when the song was over, Neil added the pinnacle to the dance by delivering to my lips a profoundly passionate kiss . . . We both stepped back breathless and in amazement at the depth of our feeling for one another.

Neil set his hands on the sides of my head. "I suppose I should be taking you back to where you are staying." Neil said.

"OH NO!!" I declared as my eyes flew open in astonishment. "In my excitement to talk to you today I forgot to get myself a room in a boarding house! What am I going to do now!?!"

Neil drew me close and comforted me. "Don't worry Lass. You may sleep in my bedroom and I will sleep out here in front of the fireplace. I've slept in worse places when I've done my rounds! I'll put a feather mattress down and I'll be fine . . . Of course if you don't trust me. Maybe we can find some other place for you to stay?"

"I trust *you* Neil, I just don't trust what other people might say about us, that's all!" I said.

"What does it matter what these people think of us? We may never see any of them ever again! If I get kicked out of this apartment then I'll just have to move back to my cabin! If anyone tells St. Timothy's I could tell them a thing or two about some of their other scientists and their 'acquaintances' with certain members of the opposite sex at a local Tea House!!" Neil announced.

"I don't think I want to hear anymore about that subject, but as long as we both promise to behave ourselves! I guess it will be all right. Then I can make you breakfast in the morning." I added.

"That sound's absolutely wonderful!" Neil stated. "It's been a long time since anyone made me breakfast, in fact, it's been a long time since I've eaten breakfast!"

My heart went out to him. "It won't be that way for long!" I declared. "As soon as we're married you'll have breakfast every morning! I'll make sure of it, even if I have to serve it to you in bed!"

"This is sounding better all the time!!" Neil proclaimed as he drew me into him and kissed me eagerly. 

Neil showed me where his bedroom was. "The wash basin is over there. If there is anything else that you need, please let me know." Neil paused. "I can't tell you how glad I am that you came here today Christy."

"I can't tell *you* how glad *I* am that I came here today Neil!" I announced as I walked over to where Neil was standing in the doorway. "Now I can call my mother and we can plan the wedding I was supposed to be planning all the while."

Neil smiled a joy filled smile! I brushed back the stray hair on his face. "Today you have made me the happiest man on earth!" Neil said as he took me in his arms. "I'll cherish you all the days of my life, I promise, Christy. I'll love you always and forever! I will take you for better or for worse, but I will never take you for granted!" He placed his hand on my cheek; he scanned my face as though he were seeing me for the first time. He stroked my cheek lovingly with his thumb. He looked from my eyes to my mouth. "I love you Christy." He whispered barely audible. He looked intently at me as he stroked my face. He traced my lips with his thumb, ever so lightly. A shiver ran through me. He raised his other hand to the other side of my face and he did the same thing. As another shiver ran through me. Neil drew me close and kissed me tenderly. "I can hardly believe that you will soon be my bride!" He held me for a while longer gazing at me fondly. "I suppose I should let you get some sleep. Are you sure you won't disappear by morning, like all the other dreams I've had of you? You'll still be here in the morning won't you?"

"I promise! I'll be here when you wake up! I'll make you breakfast before you leave for work! If I don't wake up early enough, I give you permission to wake me. Alright?" I asked. 

"I will! Nothing could keep me from it Christy! Not just for breakfast, but so that I can see your lovely face before I leave for work in the morning!" He brushed my hair back from my face. "I can scarcely endure the wait for the day that I'll wake up to this vision of loveliness *every* morning!"

I slipped my arms around him and snuggled into his chest. I felt like I belonged there. I held him close as he buried his face in my hair. "Neil, now I know what it's like to have found the place where I belong! I realize how wonderful it is to be in the place that God has chosen for me. I am amazed at how wonderful it feels to have made the right choice, the choice of my heart and not my head. I can't thank you enough for coming back and confessing your love for me! If you hadn't I never would have known how you felt, and I never would have realized what the choice of my heart is!"

I felt Neil shaking gently. I looked up to see that he was crying. I placed my hands on his cheeks and brushed the tears away with my thumbs. I kissed him on one cheek and then the other. "I've never had anyone think of me that way before." Neil cried. "This is the first time I've ever felt that I truly belong. I'm finally doing the right thing. This is the first time I've done anything that was truly blessed by God. Without your influence this past year I probably would never have come to realize any of this. I can't thank-you enough Christy." He drew me in to him and held me close. I stayed in Neil's embrace until I felt him stop shaking completely. I was glad that Neil was learning to do things God's way and that God was using me to help bring it about because I was fulfilling my life's goal as well. 

"You even have my permission to look in on me during the night if you think I might have disappeared, OK?" I added a little shyly.

"I just may take you up on that offer!! I've had too many dreams like this that just vanished by morning!" Neil confessed.

"Well, I'm sure this one won't! I'll be right here in the morning. I promise!!" I consoled. "Now, I had better let you go, I'm sure you need plenty of rest before you go to work in the morning!"

"I won't sleep much thinking of you here tonight!" Neil admitted. "But this night I'll be lying awake thinking of you here in my arms and accepting my proposal! I won't be having just a dream or a vision of you, but a memory!" He paused. "Good night Christy!"

"Good night Neil. I *WILL* see you in the morning!!" I replied. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I could smell the scent of Neil on everything in this room! When I snuggled down into the bed I felt close to Neil because his scent was on the pillows, the sheets, the quilt, everything!! I felt like he was right there with me!

I don't know what time it was when I fell asleep, but I had a wonderful dream. I dreamt of our wedding. Not the nightmarish dream I had, had weeks ago, but a wonderful, beautiful dream! This time I was very much in love and eager to be marrying the man who was the choice of my heart! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I woke some time during the night and I was thirsty. I tried to walk as softly as I could. I didn't want to awaken Neil and have him think I was an intruder in his apartment! I tiptoed to the kitchen. I drank long and deep; the cool sweet water was just what I needed! For the first time I noticed the view out of the kitchen window. It looked interesting even in the darkness. I would have to make it a point to examine this view more closely in the daylight. 

I glanced around the kitchen a little more. I had been too anxious for Neil's arrival to really enjoy any of this before. Neil had picked a lovely little apartment! It would have been a nice place for the two of us . . .? 'Hmm' I thought out loud to myself just under my breath. 'Maybe that's why he picked it out in the first place . . . Well, if he did pick it out for me as well as himself he did an excellent job, because I loved it!!'

There was a sound coming from the other room, it sounded as if someone was crying. I padded back down the hall toward the sound. I followed it to Neil's bedroom where I had been sleeping. I peered around the corner to find Neil on his knees between the foot of the bed and the doorway, crying. I walked up behind him and put my hands on his shoulders "What's wrong, Neil?" 

At the sound of my voice and the touch of my hands he jumped and spun around in surprise. He stared up at me for a few moments. "Christy?" He said with his voice catching in his throat.

"Yes, Neil, I'm here. I went to get a drink of water. What's the matter . . . Never mind. You don't have to tell me. I already know. You came in to make sure I was still here and I wasn't, was I?" I knelt down beside him on the floor.

He nodded his head. He reached out and pulled me close to him. He held me tight! I laid my head on his chest and he kept kissing the top of my head over and over. I drew my head out so I could look at Neil. He placed one hand on each side of my head and kissed my face all over. Then he hugged me tightly again!! "I thought I had just had another one of my dreams about you!! Only this one had seemed so real I could not believe that it might only have been a dream. When I walked in here and found no one here I thought I was going insane! I was so sure that this 'vision' was real!! I couldn't believe that it wasn't, but yet you weren't here!!. . ." He voice trailed off.

"I'm right here Neil!! I promised I wouldn't leave! I won't either!!" I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him as tightly as I could. He enfolded me in his arms and clutched me firmly to him.

"You feel so good in my arms!" Neil exclaimed. "Once we are married I don't think I shall ever let you go!!"

"I don't want you too either!" I declared. "Because I don't ever want to let go of you!!"

Neil turned his face toward mine. The moonlight from the window was streaming in on his face. A breeze blowing in through the open window was blowing his hair back softly. He looked so handsome! I could see the tear stains on his cheeks. As he turned his head I felt his lips brush my cheek. I hugged him tighter. I knew he wanted to kiss me, but for some reason I was afraid at the moment. Maybe it was being alone in the dark with Neil in his bedroom. He buried his face in my neck and kissed it softly. I wanted to kiss him, but I knew I shouldn't. I kept picturing him the way I saw him last at the Holcombe's the day the men of the cove were putting up their new cabin! I had to put that thought aside for now and back away from Neil. I moved back and I patted his cheek. "I know you want to kiss me Neil, but I can't just now. Not here!" I said as I motioned around his bedroom

"I know Christy. It's just very difficult for me right now. I was so worried that's all." Neil added. 

"I know you were. But I'm not going to disappear! I promise! Wake me in time to make you breakfast."

"Maybe I'll stay home tomorrow so I can show you around the town!"

"I've got to leave in the early afternoon." I admitted. "I've got a train ticket for then just in case you didn't want to speak to me, I didn't want to stay any longer than I had to!! I'm sorry!! I just kept picturing the way you looked at me when you rode away."

"I couldn't face you when I thought you just wanted to say good-bye before your wedding to Grantland." Neil said as he looked down at the floor.

"I would never have treated you that way if I had still planned to marry David!! I would have put your feelings before my own!" I commented. "Especially after your profession of love for me at Ingle's Cove! I would never have taken your feelings lightly especially after that!! But now you won't have to worry about that anymore!" I moved closer to him and placed my hand on his cheek. "Because now I'm going to be *your* wife!"

"Yes, you are, aren't you?" Neil brightened. "That wasn't a dream either was it?" I shook my head. He took my hand from his cheek and kissed the palm of my hand. 

He took me into his arms and held me tight. Neil looked up to Heaven. "Thank-you!" He said ever so softly. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I slept so soundly after Neil and I parted early in the morning hours that I was totally surprised when I felt his lips against mine to wake me in the morning! I looked a bit shocked at first I'm sure! But I recuperated quickly! I blissfully shared in the kiss! "Good morning!" Neil whispered with a loving smile on his face. "I know it's early, but I couldn't bare to be without you any longer! I tried watching you sleep, but that wasn't enough! I want to talk with you, I want to hold you in my arms again before I have to leave."

"Well, then I best get up and start your Breakfast! I can't allow you to leave for work on an empty stomach, now can I?" I offered. "Now you scoot on out of here and I'll get dressed and start cooking!"

"I won't stop you! I'll be in the Dining Room!" Neil said as he rose from the side of the bed and walked out the door. He paused just once as he was leaving to look back at me and smile. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I washed and dressed. Then I walked into the kitchen. I pulled out the frying pan and the food. Everything I would need! As I was cooking I felt a presence looking over my shoulder! I glanced over to see Neil watching me as I cooked! 

"That looks tasty!" Neil commented.

"I hope so!" I replied. "I took lessons from Ida while she was at the mission."

Neil slipped his arms around me as I stood by the stove. "You don't know how many times I've pictured you here doing just this!" He kissed my neck softly. "I'm so glad to have you here!"

"I'm glad I came!" I said. "Neil?" I asked. "Did you pick out this apartment for the two of us?" 

He looked at me shyly and nodded his head.

"It's excellent Neil! I love it!" I announced. "I'm sorry I wasn't more forceful about professing my love for *you*. Because then we could have lived here together for at least a while! I've enjoyed my time here with you."

"As have I!" Neil stated as he turned me around to face him.

"Is it alright if I kiss you in the kitchen, Christy?"

"I think that would be wonderful!" I proclaimed. Neil drew me close and kissed me sweetly. He hugged me tighter before letting me go.

He sounded more serious for a moment. "What time do you have to leave today?"

"My train is scheduled for 1:00 P.M."

"Would you do a favor for me this morning?" Neil asked.

"If I can. I'd love to! What is it?"

"Would you come to the hospital with me? I want to show you off to everyone!"

"I'd love to go with you! It'll be my chance to see where you work! Maybe I'll get to see Dr. Wade and thank him for all he's done!"

"I'm sure you will! Wade is there everyday!"

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	9. Early Morning Nightmare

**__**

The Revelation ~ Early Morning Nightmare

I woke some time during the night and I was thirsty. I tried to walk as softly as I could. I didn't want to awaken Neil and have him think I was an intruder in his apartment! I tiptoed to the kitchen. I drank long and deep; the cool sweet water was just what I needed! For the first time I noticed the view out of the kitchen window. It looked interesting even in the darkness. I would have to make it a point to examine this view more closely in the daylight. 

I glanced around the kitchen a little more. I had been too anxious for Neil's arrival to really enjoy any of this before. Neil had picked a lovely little apartment! It would have been a nice place for the two of us . . .? 'Hmm' I thought out loud to myself just under my breath. 'Maybe that's why he picked it out in the first place . . . Well, if he did pick it out for me as well as himself he did an excellent job, because I loved it!!'

There was a sound coming from the other room, it sounded as if someone was crying. I padded back down the hall toward the sound. I followed it to Neil's bedroom where I had been sleeping. I peered around the corner to find Neil on his knees between the foot of the bed and the doorway, praying and crying. I walked up behind him and put my hands on his shoulders "What's wrong, Neil?" 

At the sound of my voice and the touch of my hands he jumped and spun around in surprise. He stared up at me for a few moments. "Christy?" He said with his voice catching in his throat.

"Yes, Neil, I'm here. I went to get a drink of water. What's the matter . . . Never mind. You don't have to tell me. I already know. You came in to make sure I was still here and I wasn't, was I?" I knelt down beside him on the floor.

He nodded his head. He reached out and pulled me close to him. He held me tight! I laid my head on his chest and he kept kissing the top of my head over and over. I drew my head out so I could look at Neil. He placed one hand on each side of my head and kissed my face all over. Then he hugged me tightly again!! "I thought I had just had another one of my dreams about you!! Only this one had seemed so real I could not believe that it might only have been a dream. When I walked in here and found no one here I thought I was going insane! I was so sure that this 'vision' was real!! I couldn't believe that it wasn't, but yet you weren't here!!. . ." He voice trailed off.

"I'm right here Neil!! I promised I wouldn't leave! I won't either!!" I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him as tightly as I could. He enfolded me in his arms and clutched me firmly to him.

"You feel so good in my arms!" Neil exclaimed. "Once we are married I don't think I shall ever let you go!!"

"I don't want you too either!" I declared. "Because I don't ever want to let go of you!!"

Neil turned his face toward mine. The moonlight from the window was streaming in on his face. A breeze blowing in through the open window was blowing his hair back softly. He looked so handsome! I could see the tear stains on his cheeks. As he turned his head I felt his lips brush my cheek. I hugged him tighter. I knew he wanted to kiss me, but for some reason I was afraid at the moment. Maybe it was being alone in the dark with Neil in his bedroom. He buried his face in my neck and kissed it softly. I wanted to kiss him, but I knew I shouldn't. I kept picturing him the way I saw him last at the Holcombe's the day the men of the cove were putting up their new cabin! I had to put that thought aside for now and back away from Neil. I moved back and I patted his cheek. "I know you want to kiss me Neil, but I can't just now. Not here!" I said as I motioned around his bedroom

"I know Christy. It's just very difficult for me right now. I was so worried that's all." Neil added. 

"I know you were. But I'm not going to disappear! I promise! Wake me in time to make you breakfast."

"Maybe I'll stay home tomorrow so I can show you around the town!"

"I've got to leave in the early afternoon." I admitted. "I've got a train ticket for then just in case you didn't want to speak to me, I didn't want to stay any longer than I had to!! I'm sorry!! I kept picturing the way you looked at me when you rode away."

"I couldn't face you when I thought you just wanted to say good-bye before your wedding to Grantland." Neil said as he looked down at the floor.

"I would never have treated you that way if I had still planned to marry David!! I would have put your feelings before my own!" I commented. "Especially after your profession of love for me at Ingle's Cove! I would never have taken your feelings lightly especially after that!! But now you won't have to worry about that anymore!" I moved closer to him and placed my hand on his cheek. "Because now I'm going to be *your* wife!"

"Yes, you are, aren't you?" Neil brightened. "That wasn't a dream either was it?" I shook my head. He took my hand from his cheek and kissed the palm of my hand. 

He took me into his arms and held me tight. Neil looked up to Heaven. "Thank-you!" He said ever so softly. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I slept so soundly after Neil and I parted early in the morning hours that I was totally surprised when I felt his lips against mine to wake me in the morning! I looked a bit shocked at first I'm sure! But I recuperated quickly! I blissfully shared in the kiss! "Good morning!" Neil whispered with a loving smile on his face. "I know it's early, but I couldn't bare to be without you any longer! I tried watching you sleep, but that wasn't enough! I want to talk with you, I want to hold you in my arms again before I have to leave."

"Well, then I best get up and start your Breakfast! I can't allow you to leave for work on an empty stomach, now can I?" I offered. "Now you scoot on out of here and I'll get dressed and start cooking Breakfast!"

"I won't stop you! I'll be in the Dining Room!" Neil said as he rose from the side of the bed and walked out the door. He paused just once as he was leaving to look back at me and smile. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I washed and dressed. Then I walked into the kitchen. I pulled out the frying pan and the food. Everything I would need! As I was cooking I felt a presence looking over my shoulder! I glanced over to see Neil watching me as I cooked! 

"That looks tasty!" Neil commented.

"I hope so!" I replied. "I took lessons from Ida while she was at the mission."

Neil slipped his arms around me as I stood by the stove. "You don't know how many times I've pictured you here doing just this!" He kissed my neck softly. "I'm so glad to have you here!"

"I'm glad I came!" I said. "Neil?" I asked. "Did you pick out this apartment for the two of us?" 

He looked at me shyly and nodded his head.

"It's excellent Neil! I love it!" I announced. "I'm sorry I wasn't more forceful about professing my love for *you*. Because then we could have lived here together for at least a while! I've enjoyed my time here with you."

"As have I!" Neil stated as he turned me around to face him.

"Is it alright if I kiss you in the kitchen, Christy?"

"I think that would be wonderful!" I proclaimed. Neil drew me close and kissed me sweetly. He hugged me tighter before letting me go.

He sounded more serious for a moment. "What time do you have to leave today?"

"My train is scheduled for 1:00 P.M."

"Would you do a favor for me this morning?" Neil asked.

"If I can. I'd love to! What is it?"

"Would you come to the hospital with me? I want to show you off to everyone!"

"I'd love to go with you! It'll be my chance to see where you work! Maybe I'll get to see Dr. Wade and thank him for all he's done!"

"I'm sure you will! Wade is there everyday!"

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	10. The Hospital

**__**

The Revelation ~ The Hospital/Going Home

Neil and I took a cab to the hospital in the morning. It seemed so strange for me to see him in the city! He looked so different! But he fit right in with everything here! I was very impressed! 

When we arrived at the hospital Neil slipped his arm around my waist and led me inside. He stopped once in the corridor and he turned me to look at him. He put his hand on the side of my face. "Thank-you again Christy! I'm glad you agreed to come here with me this morning. I can hardly wait to see the look on everyone's face when I introduce you to them!" He kissed me softly. 

At that moment a voice beside us said "MacNeill! Does this display mean that you two are *finally* engaged?" We turned to see Dr. Wade standing beside us with his arms crossed trying to look serious. 

I blushed when I saw him standing there. Neil cleared his throat. "Ahh, yes! It does Dr. Wade!"

"It's about time, that's all I've got to say!!" Dr. Wade paused. "But I am happy for both of you! Congratulations!!" He shook Neil's hand and he kissed me on the cheek.

"Watch it Wade! That's my fiancée you're kissing!!" Neil chuckled; he looked more proud than I had ever seen him before!

"I'm sorry MacNeill! I must have gotten carried away!" Dr. Wade laughed.

"Well, as long as you're just congratulating her I'll let it go this time, but don't ever let it happen again!!" Neil said with fake concern.

"I'll try to control myself Dr. MacNeill!" Dr. Wade added.

"Now!" Neil said. "I'm going to take my fiancée to the lab and introduce, or should I say, show her off, to everyone there!!" Neil was smiling from ear to ear!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I had never seen Neil more ecstatic then he was as he introduced me to everyone in the lab!! It was fun to watch him! He was enjoying every minute of it! Plus he couldn't help but seize every opportunity to warn any to keep their distance from his *fiancée*!! I think he liked that word all of a sudden especially when it proceeded by the word *my* . . . I'll have to admit, so did I! 

Nearly everyone joked with him about it, but I could tell by the shocked expressions on their faces that they could hardly believe that this was the exact same man that had been sleeping in the lab the night before last, so that he didn't have to go home to his apartment; the same man that was so melancholy since returning from his home town, a few weeks ago!! He was a changed man and they were greatly impressed by the 'new' Neil MacNeill!! As was I!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

At One O'clock Neil took me to the train station. As much as I hated to leave, I just couldn't wait to get back to Cutter Gap and start planning the wedding that I was supposed to have been planning all along! I knew some people just wouldn't understand if Neil and I got married so soon after I had called off my wedding to David, but yet I wanted us to be married as soon as possible! 

Before I could leave I had to ask Neil what he thought. "Neil, what do you think we should do about our wedding plans?"

"I think we should definitely plan our wedding, Christy!" Neil joked.

"No, no! I mean when do you think we should plan the wedding for, which date? I've just been wondering what people will think if we get married so soon after I was originally supposed to marry David. Would that be in bad taste?"

"In the mountain's, you are almost always going to offend someone with anything that you do! We would offend people if we got married today, we would offend people if we get married in six months! We would offend *some* people if we got married at any time at all!!" Neil offered. 

"I suppose, but what do you think is right, Neil?" I asked.

"I think we should plan our wedding for two weeks from Friday! I will need to have two weeks here to tie up any loose ends. That will give me a couple of days before the wedding to get things settled at home, before I bring my lovely bride home to live with me!" Neil said with a sly smile on his face. I blushed crimson knowing what he was thinking! "My shy lass! I'll enjoy working through that shy exterior! Come here love!"

I moved closer to Neil my face was still red, I could feel it! He cupped my chin in his hand and lifted my head to look at him. "You know I wouldn't do anything to hurt you Christy! You won't ever have to be afraid of me!" He tilted his head and reached forward to kiss me tenderly. "I never want to drive you away from me! I want you to be with me forever! Don't be afraid to tell me if I've hurt you in anyway! I don't ever want to cause you pain! I love you so very much, I won't ever get enough of holding you in my arms and loving you!" He held me tightly to him as the train pulled into the station.

"I'll miss you Neil!" I started to cry. "I don't want to leave you!"

"I'll call you every night! I promise! Don't leave me out of the wedding plans! Remember everything and tell me all about it each night when I call!" He paused for a moment. "I'll take care of the Honeymoon plans from here!" I felt myself blush again! 

"A blush just discussing making the plans for our honeymoon? This is going to be fun! I can tell already! I can hardly wait!" Neil said eagerly. 

"Where are we going to go?" I asked.

"That will be my wedding present to you my love! You'll find out after the wedding! I know exactly where I want to take you and I am anxious to see your reaction to it!" Neil smiled lovingly at me, "and don't worry you'll love it!! I know you will!" 

"I don't doubt you in the least! I'm sure I will, as long as I'm with you! I don't care where we go!" I smiled back at him. I knew I could trust him. 

"I need to get on the train." I said reluctantly. "Two weeks and you'll be coming home, correct?"

"I'll be working for two more weeks, but I don't know when I will arrive home. I'll be back as soon as I possibly can, I promise." Neil answered. He leaned into my ear and whispered, "I won't go any longer than is absolutely necessary without holding you in my arms!" I smiled a shy smile.

"Don't forget to call me!" I said.

"Nothing could keep me from it." Neil commented. "You'll be remaining at Mrs. Tatum's boarding house tomorrow evening will you not? I don't want you to ride back to the mission in the dark by yourself!" 

"I'll stay at Mrs. Tatum's, Neil, if you want me to."

"Of course I do! You stay in El Pano and head home the next day! Promise me, Christy that you won't try to make it home in the dark? I couldn't bear it if anything happened to you!" 

"I promise, I'll stay in El Pano tomorrow evening. You won't have to worry about me!" I said. 

"Thank-you." Neil replied softly. "Now may I have a kiss good-bye my love?"

"Of course you may!" I told him. 

He placed his hand on the side on my face and smiled sweetly. He brushed my cheek softly with his thumb. "My Christy!" He whispered ever so softly as he proceeded to kiss me affectionately. He rested his forehead against mine and looked into my eyes. "I'll miss you Lass! You've only been mine for a few hours and already you have to leave me! Watching you leave is going to be one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do!"

"Leaving you is going to be difficult for me also. If I had known how things were going to end I would have bought a train ticket for a later time, or later date." I admitted. "I was so afraid that you wouldn't allow me to speak that I bought my ticket for the next train out of Baltimore. I'm sorry, Neil. I wish I didn't have to leave you! I'll speak to you on the telephone every night! I can hardly wait to hear your voice again!"

Neil took me in his arms once more. He held me closer then ever. "I want to remember the feel of you in my arms when you're gone!" He said as he slowly rocked me back and forth. He placed his face on the top of my head and inhaled deeply. "I want to remember the scent of you when you aren't here!"

I buried my face in his chest and inhaled long and deep. "I want to remember the scent of you also!" I said.

The conductor announced that the train was going to leave. I looked up into Neil's eyes. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes. He looked at me with tears in his eyes as well. "Thank-you for everything Christy!" He sighed deeply. "I can hardly believe you're mine! You aren't Grantland's after all! You're mine! I can't thank-you enough for everything you've done for me by showing up here yesterday and even more so, by accepting my proposal!!" He lifted my chin so that I was looking at him and he kissed me intently.

As much as I hated to leave I turned toward the train. I stood at the back of the train and held Neil's hand until the train began to pull away. He reluctantly released my hand at the end of the platform. 

"I love you Neil!" I yelled. "Don't forget to call me!"

"I love you Christy!" Neil yelled. "I will not forget!"

We waved until we could no longer see each other. With tears streaming down my face I turned and entered the train.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

End of Omitted Scenes/The Revelation Part 9 ~ The Hospital/Going Home

Coming Soon: Omitted Scenes/The Revelation Part 10 ~ Planning the Proper Wedding


	11. The Proper Wedding

**__**

The Revelation ~ Planning the Proper Wedding

The trip home from Baltimore was uneventful. Exceptionally long, with over sixteen hours on the train I had lot's of time to think, but a nice trip, I had a lot of time to engrave the events of yesterday, last night and this morning, in my mind! Neil's proposal . . . at last!!! The look on his face when he first noticed me in his apartment, I just had to smile. The look on his face when I showed up this morning when he thought I was gone, my heart ached when I thought of the fear and despair on his face. But most of all I wanted to remember the way it felt to be in his embrace, the feel of his lips on mine and the scent of him, I sat back and closed my eyes, sighing deeply. It felt so right to have made the proper choice. 

I stayed the night at Mrs. Tatum's Boarding House. I missed Neil so very much. I wished I had been more aware of things when Neil had returned to confess his love for me. I would now be in Baltimore with the man I love instead of spending this time alone. It was entirely my own fault I knew that. I had denied my feelings for Neil so long that now that I realized them I longed for him more than ever! It would be torture to be without him for these two weeks, albeit it was self-imposed torture, that wouldn't make it any easier. I was sitting in my room watching the sunset when Mrs. Tatum started knocking on the door. "Miss Huddleston? There's a telephone call for you downstairs?" She said as I answered the door.

"Thank-you Mrs. Tatum! I'll be right down!" I went to get my shawl. On the way down the stairs all I could think of was 'who could be calling me here?' Mrs. Tatum showed me where the telephone was.

I picked it up, "Hello?"

"Hello Love!" Neil said. "I couldn't wait any longer to hear your voice!" 

"Neil! It's so good to hear from you again!" I said. "How was work today?"

"I got a lot more accomplished today then I have in weeks! For the first time I could concentrate on my research instead of a vision of loveliness named Christy! I thought about you all day, but this time, instead of dragging me down it put a spring in my step! Everyone noticed the difference. Wade said he's going to call to thank-you for finally setting me straight! He says I'm finally of some use to them and I'm only going to be here for two more weeks!! He doesn't know whether to be mad or glad! We had a good laugh over it anyway. I said, maybe we would come back to Baltimore one day, but I didn't make any commitments!"

I laughed. "I didn't know my arrival in Baltimore was going to cause such problems! Maybe I shouldn't have come!" I teased.

"Never Christy!" Neil almost yelled, but he quickly composed himself. "I'm sorry I yelled! I just don't want you to ever feel that way! I've never been this happy before, Christy! I wouldn't change anything!"

"I was only teasing Neil! I'm ecstatic that I went to Baltimore!" I said. "I only wanted to see your reaction, that's all!"

"I'm glad to hear that Christy." Neil said with a note of relief in his voice. "Have you called your parents yet?" 

"No, I was going to wait until I got back to the mission, but I suppose I could call them from here as well. I haven't much to do here anyway! Besides, I can hardly wait to call mother and start planning the proper wedding, this time!" I paused. "I miss you Neil!"

"I miss you too Christy!" Neil said. "I'm counting down the days until I see you again. I'll be returning on the 6:45 A.M. train on the Wednesday before the wedding! I looked into the Honeymoon arrangements today." Neil paused. "Christy stop blushing!"

I giggled. "How did you know I was blushing?"

"I know you Love! You blushed twice the other day just talking about the Honeymoon and bringing you home with me! So I knew you just had to be blushing this time as well!" Neil chuckled. 

"You read me like a book Neil MacNeill! That scares me sometimes! What will it be like when we're living together!" I exclaimed.

"Christy you're blushing again Love!" Neil teased. He was right! I could hardly believe I had actually mentioned our 'living together'!! "It's alright Christy. It's going to happen, and no one is listening but me anyway. I won't tell anyone what you said! Not that they won't be able to figure it out on their own once you announce our engagement! That sounds so good Christy! I wish I could be there when you tell everyone!" 

"I wish you could be here too. Even more, I wish I hadn't been so blind to you last month or I could be there in Baltimore with you right now! I was just thinking about that when you called. This is going to be torture being without you these next two weeks, but it's my own doing and no one else's! I'm sorry for being blind, deaf and stupid!" I said with a giggle.

"I know you couldn't have married me when you knew how I felt about God. You're my angel Christy! You've shown me the way back to God and I will be eternally grateful to you for that! Now I really do believe that God cares about what happens to me. He's given me the deepest desire of my heart! Or at least He's going to give me the deepest desire of my heart . . . *YOU* Christy, as my lovely bride!" He paused. Then he chuckled warmly. "You're doing it again, I know you are!"

I had to laugh out loud! He *could* read me like a book! "Of course I am Neil! It doesn't take much to make me blush, you know that! Especially when you start talking about our plans for the future!" I giggled one again. 

"I best let you go for tonight Christy. It's getting late and you still want to telephone your parents and speak to them. Besides your cheeks need a rest from all of that blushing!" He chuckled. "I'll speak to you tomorrow evening; I'll contact you at the mission. Be careful going back home tomorrow!" Neil paused a moment. "I had an ulterior motive for calling you at Mrs. Tatum's today!"

"What was it?" I asked.

"I wanted to make sure that you were actually there. Then I can sleep tonight because I know you're safe and sound. If you hadn't been there I would have worried about you all night! Praying that you would make it home safe in the dark." Neil admitted. "Then you would have been in for a scolding tomorrow evening!" He chuckled.

"Well, then I'm glad I stayed here tonight! I don't want you to lose any more sleep! I don't want Dr. Wade to be mad at me for anything else!" I giggled. "I knew how badly you wanted me to stay here this evening. I wasn't about to start disobeying you! I love you too much to make you worry needlessly." I paused. "Take care of yourself Neil! I love you!"

"You do the same Christy! I love you also!" I could hear Neil sigh on the other end. "As much as I hate to say this, I must! Good-bye Love! I'll be sure to call you tomorrow evening!"

"I can hardly wait! Good-bye Neil!"

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I telephoned my parents, and they weren't the least bit surprise! In fact mother said she had only placed things on hold. She did not return anything that she had gotten, because she was sure I would be calling her soon to tell them I was marrying Neil. 

I was so blessed to have parents that understood, although they hadn't always. But since last Thanksgiving they seemed to understand better then ever. Mother said she knew last November already that I had feelings for Neil and she was surprised when I had called to tell them that I was going to marry David! Mother and Neil had something in common! They both knew what I was thinking even before I did. Mother could read my feelings before I could, but Neil could tell me both my feelings and my thoughts, before I knew them myself! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

The following morning I retrieved Buttons from the Livery Stable and rode back to the mission. I had plenty of time to think as I rode the seven miles home. I knew my parents understood my feelings for Neil and the new wedding plans, but would everyone else understand? Would the people of the cove understand my newly discovered love for Neil, or my family and friends? I didn't have any idea what they would think of me. But I had made my decision now. There was nothing that was going to change my mind on this matter! I would be steadfast in this decision if it was the last thing I did. Neil MacNeill was the man for me; I knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt if the cove didn't believe as I did then that was their problem and not mine! I only hoped that Neil would feel the same way that I did. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Upon arriving back at the mission I approached Miss Alice in her chamber. I knocked on the door and she bid me enter. "Miss Alice, I need to speak with you if you have a few moments." I said softly.

"I will always have time for thee Christy. What is it that thee would like to discuss with me?" She said.

"As you know I traveled to Baltimore to speak with Neil, you did realize that, didn't you?" I asked.

"Yes, I did Christy. How did everything go in Baltimore? Did thee speak to Neil?"

"As a matter of fact I did. I finally got to pour out everything that was in my heart. I told him that I had made the choice of my heart and that, that choice was him." I paused, thinking about the events of a few nights ago . . .could this all have happened only three days ago?! "Needless to say he was thrilled by the news!" I walked closer to Alice and showed her the ring that Neil had given me. I didn't want to show off, but I thought Miss Alice would be interested.

"It's beautiful Christy!" Miss Alice said. "If I'm not mistaken that belonged to Neil's great-great-great Grandmother, the grandmother of Neil MacNeill of Barra back in Scotland in the 1700's! That is a precious heirloom you're wearing on your finger Christy!"

"I thought Neil said it was an antique! But I never imagined anything as extraordinary as that Miss Alice!" I exclaimed. "You see when Neil was carrying me back from Ingle's Cove he stopped to take a drink of water. Before we started on our way again, he checked on something in a cloth bag in his pocket. He told me it was an antique that he was going to show me, but he realized that I wouldn't be interested in it. He pulled *this ring* out of a bag that looked very much like the one he was carrying in Ingle's Cove! Now that you say that about Neil's ancestor's it has to be the same ring you're speaking of! Now I'd better be extra protective of it!" I paused. "I'll ask Neil about it when he calls this evening to be sure."

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

As I began to bake cookies for our reception, I began to feel as though I had done this once before! I wanted to look forward to my wedding to Neil! I knew this wedding was totally different or at least I should be looking at it as though it were! I didn't want Neil to think that he was just stepping into David's shoes, because that was the last thing that I wanted him to think! He was the man that I was 'in love' with, I couldn't live without him! He *WAS NOT* a substitute for David! He was the man that was meant to be my groom all the while! I was just too blind to see it! But now that I saw the light, I would never change my mind again!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

When the telephone rang in the evening I was on top of it before it had a chance to ring a second time!! "Hello!" I yelled, afterward I was afraid I hurt the ear of the person on the other end!

"Hello Lass! I see you aren't excited to hear from me!" Neil laughed out loud.

"I'm sorry I spoke so loudly! I was just anxious to hear from you!" I announced. "How did your day go today Neil?"

"We may have a breakthrough! It's very exciting! Of course we're still a long way from a cure at this point, but it's a step in the right direction at least." Neil sounded excited as he spoke.

"I'm so happy for you Neil!! I'll keep praying that you will find a cure soon!" I said.

"I won't be here long enough to find a cure, but at least I could possibly be a part in it!!" Neil said. "How you today Love?"

"Much better now that I'm speaking with you! I miss you! I spoke to my parents last evening after we hung up. They weren't surprised in the least. In face mother was so sure that I would be calling them to tell them that I was going to be marrying you that they didn't even return anything. . .today I started preparing food again. I'll be kept quite busy with that up until the wedding!"

"I have everything arranged for the Honeymoon! I can hardly wait to take you away with me! You're going to love it, I know you will! You think a lot like I do, so if I love it, I know you will!" Neil laughed. I knew what he was thinking, but I wasn't going to volunteer any information about my blushing cheeks! 

"As long as I'm with you Neil, I don't care where we go!" I blushed even deeper, but I didn't care anymore! My cheeks would just have to get used to this kind of talk!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	12. Neil's Return

**__**

The Revelation ~ Neil's Return

The days went by slowly, but that seemed to give me more time to accomplish the tasks set before me and the tasks in turn helped to keep my mind off the fact that Neil was not here.

Each evening I sat anxiously by waiting for the telephone to ring! He never missed an evening! Night after night I was always thrilled to hear his voice!! I could hardly wait to be in his arms again upon his return to the cove!! I planned to be at the platform in El Pano when Neil arrived! I was going to surprise him. I'd stay overnight at Mrs. Tatum's so that I could be at the platform bright and early Wednesday morning.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

David was silent around me. I knew he was hurt deeply by my decision, but I had to hurt either David or Neil and I knew in my heart that Neil was the man I was to marry. I missed my friendship with David. But I knew it would never be the same as it had been too many things had happened between us for our friendship to ever be what it once was. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Late Tuesday I saddled Buttons and headed for El Pano. I had my clothes packed for tomorrow and I was so anxious to see Neil again! These past two weeks had been awful, but the days without Neil were nearly over! In two days we would be married and then there won't be separated anymore except for emergencies, but then Neil will always be returning home to me! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Neil wouldn't be calling me tonight because he was already on the train heading home! That sounded so good! I could hardly wait for tomorrow morning! 

As I lie awake in bed that night I thought, "I could have stayed in the Parlor downstairs! I'm not going to get any sleep no matter where I stay tonight!" In the times that I dosed off I dreamed that I was late meeting the train and woke myself up again! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

I stood on the platform pacing back and forth. I had arrived extra early I knew that, but I didn't want to be late! I kept listening for the train whistle, but I didn't hear it yet. I sat on the one lone bench on the platform and waited. I put my head back and fell asleep! I was awakened by the sound of the train pulling into the station! I jumped up from my seat and strode toward the train, I was excited, but I tried to maintain composure! 

Neil was already waiting outside the door before the train pulled up to the platform! Our eyes locked and we both smiled broadly. He looked different somehow then the last time I had seen him! In fact I thought he looked better then when I last saw him! He jumped off the train before it came to a complete stop, I ran to him and leaped into his arms! He enfolded me into his arms and held me close, almost in a bear-hug! 

"Oh, Christy! I've missed you Lass! You feel better in my arms then I remember!" Neil declared as he lifted me up and swung me around. 

"I've missed you also Neil!!" I exclaimed. He set my feet on the platform and placed his hand behind my head. He looked intently at me, I couldn't stop smiling! 

"I'd forgotten how incredibly beautiful you are, Love! I don't ever want to be separated from you again!" Neil held me close and inhaled deeply. He pulled back from me and leaned forward and kissed me intently. "I love you Christy! I still can't believe you're going to be my wife!"

We found a carriage to take us to the cove. Neil had two trunks, plus bags, and crates… he had to bring back all of the things that he had taken to Baltimore only months ago. The ride home was lovely. Neil and I didn't take our eyes off of each other the entire time…one of the privileges of having someone else driving us home! Neil rested his hand on the seat I took my hand and placed it on top of his. He took his hand and turned it over to hold mine. After holding it for a few moments longer Neil looked at my hand resting securely in his. I was amazed myself at the difference in the size of his hand compared to mine! But it felt so very good to have my hand in his again! 

"Alright Christy, what is in that package that you've been carrying around?" Neil asked curiously.

"This," I said picking up my package. "Is an early wedding present to you, from me!" I said. "My father has already put up a shelf above your bed to keep it on." I handed the package to Neil. "I wanted to give it to you in private, and since this is as close to private as we're likely to get in the next few days, I thought I'd bring it along today. My parents brought it with them from Asheville. I asked them to bring this for me to give to you."

Neil untied the bow and slowly removed the paper. "Intriguing!" Neil exclaimed with a wink. He set the paper aside and opened the unmarked box. Inside he found a jug and the tag said 'Gruvner's Candy Shoppe, Asheville, N.C.' he opened the jug and found it to be filled with licorice. 

"I wanted you to have this so I could tell you that I'm sure your grandfather forgave you long ago. Maybe you've had to live with his look of disappointment all these years, but I can't see where he would still be disappointed in the man you've become! You're an excellent physician and a man that any man would be proud to call their son or grandson!! I'm sure your grandfather knew you were only a boy, and boys make mistakes. He only wanted you to feel sorry for what you'd done so that you wouldn't repeat the offense, that's all he wanted to show you I'm sure of it! If he had been allowed to be with you for a longer time you would have found out the same thing…" Christy's voice trailed off as Neil looked at her with tears streaming down his face.

Putting the back of his fingers against Christy's cheek he brought his head down and rested his forehead against hers. He brushed her face softly with his thumb. "I love you Christy!" He paused to regain his composure. "I can't tell you what this means to me."

"It was the least I could do after you helped me through Fairlight's death. Oh, I know at the time I didn't feel as though you had, but your words weighed heavily on my heart and they stuck with me and helped me more then you will ever know!" Christy confessed.

Neil tilted his head to the side and kissed me affectionately. "Thank-you…for *everything*!!" Neil paused for a moment. "You even remembered the shelf above the bed?"

"Yes, my father went to your cabin and put one up for you. As a surprise from me that is!" I smiled at Neil. "Aren't you going to have any?"

"Not right now. I'm going to save that pleasure to share with my new wife on our wedding night!" Neil chuckled, as he knew I was going to blush, and I did! "I knew you'd do it!"

"Of course I would!" I said shyly. "You know it doesn't take much to make me blush. All you need to do is wink at me and I blush!"

"I'll have to be sure and wink at you as you walk down the aisle toward me on Friday!"

"You wouldn't!!" 

"Maybe, maybe not! I'll see what kind of mood I'm in that day whether I'm ecstatically happy or ecstatically happy *and* teasing!" 

I had to smile! All I could think of at that moment was to put my head on Neil's shoulder and enjoy the rest of the ride! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Back at Neil's cabin I unhitched Buttons from the back of the carriage. I needed to return to the mission before anyone noticed that I was alone at with Neil at his cabin. So when the carriage driver got into the carriage to leave, I approached Neil to say good-bye. 

"Neil, will I see you tomorrow?" I asked.

"No, Christy!" Neil said with a smile.

"No?" I questioned.

"No, I intend to be at the mission later today! I'll not go without seeing my bonnie lass any longer then need be!" He took me into his arms and kissed me sweetly. "Now, Christy Huddleston, my love, you best be on your way back to the mission before someone notices us here and starts a rumor so close to our wedding! No, I'll not have any of that!! We needn't ruin your reputation or mine this close to our marriage!" He turned me around and gave me gentle nudge toward my horse. "Now off with you lass! I'll see you later. After I've had a nap and unpacked my basic necessities!" Neil chuckled.

"Alright Neil. I'll wait, as patiently as possible, to see you later!" I said forlornly. I mounted Buttons and looked back at Neil. "Sleep well Neil! I love you!"

"I love you too lass! Off with you now so I can get to bed!" Neil laughed.

I was on my way back to the mission. It's not what I wanted to do, but I was doing what Neil expected of me. But on my return to the mission I knew for sure that my mother could most definitely keep me busy until Neil arrived! And for the next two days as well!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	13. Moonlight Confession

**__**

The Revelation ~ Moonlight Confession

We needed to clean, decorate, cook, bake, etc. etc. etc.!! There were so many details that needed to be accomplished before the wedding on Friday. 

Neil arrived early in the evening! I was working feverishly in the kitchen. I was hot from all of the baking and I know I was disheveled! Naturally Neil arrived at the point where I least wanted him to see me! My hair was falling out of the bun I had put it in this morning, my face was red hot from working in the kitchen all afternoon, I had flour on my face and my clothes! The room was loaded with the fruits of my labor though! There were cookies, cake, quick breads, and more! 

I removed from the oven the last of culinary endeavors. I leaned against the counter and wiped my forehead with my sleeve sighing long and deep! Now I had to clean up the kitchen!! I put everything away that needed to be. Then I started the dishes. 

I was nearly finished when I felt an arm encircle me and someone kissing me on the neck. I felt embarrassed to have Neil see me like this! But I looked at him anyway. "Before you say a word about my appearance Neil MacNeill, I warn you that I am sweltering, and in need of a break. I am *not* in a good mood right now!!" I nearly glared at him.

"Thank-you for the warning lass, but I was just about to tell you how beautiful you look with flour on your cheeks!" he chuckled. "Let's see what I can do to change your attitude!" He kissed my neck again, as he turned me toward him, continuing to kiss my neck and cheek until he reached my mouth. I gladly accepted! Now that was what I had been in need of all afternoon!! 

I smiled at Neil! "Thank-you! I needed that!" I sighed.

"It was my pleasure Miss Huddleston!" Neil said as he released me from his embraced. "It looks as though you could do with a wee bit of assistance here! What can I do for you?"

"If you don't mind you could help me dry the dishes!?!" I asked. 

"I came to spend time with my lass and if I have to dry dishes to do that, then I will!" He turned me to look at him again. As he kissed me sweetly, "But you'll owe me a walk in the moonlight after if I dry the dishes for you, is it a deal?"

I put my finger on the side of my face as if I was thinking about it. But my smile gave me away and Neil kissed me again. "Of course it's alright Neil! It's more then alright! I'm looking forward to it!"

Neil moved his face to within inches of mine and whispered, "So am I!" We both smiled. Somehow we finished the dishes in record time! 

It felt so good to be out of that kitchen…finally!!! 

Hand in hand we walked outside. I stretched my aching back and breathed deeply of the cool night air.

"It's a beautiful evening Neil!"

"Yes, it is, Christy." Neil sounded almost sad.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Neil took my hand and we walked to the gazebo. He sat down and drew me down beside him. He put his arms around me. He looked very serious. "Christy, the night we were trapped in the cabin, there was something that I wanted to tell you, but you wouldn't allow me to finish my thought. I've got to finish that thought and allow you to think about it, at least over night before we get married…" Neil paused. 

I looked at him with a worried expression on my face. I had no idea what was going to happen next. Although I was fairly certain he wasn't going to call off our wedding, this was definitely something that could affect it!

"Christy, when you said, 'I don't understand you. How your mind works.' I said, 'sometimes I don't understand myself.' You reply with, 'You said you loved me, yet you left. What kind of logic is that?' I tried to explain my logic to you, but you took it the wrong way. You thought I was looking at you as an outsider, but I was looking at myself as an outsider in the world that you come from! I can't offer you the same life as Grantland. I don't have the stable life that he has, the comforts, the life you deserve. I'm gone sometimes weeks at a time. I get called away often every night, sometimes every other night. Last year I made 174 night calls. You've already given up so much to come here, I can't ask you to make a permanent sacrifice by marrying me. I told you that no matter how many times I've tried to leave, I've always come back. This is my life Christy. I want you to be sure that this is where you want to stay. I love you more then anything, but I love you too much to watch you make a huge mistake.

"These mountains are filled with hate, every hardship imaginable, suffering, sacrifice…I want you to be happy in the decision that you make. I've seen how you've tried to adjust to life here, but you're still struggling with it. You love the children and the people here, but, is that enough for you to be happy here?

"Don't get me wrong, Christy. I know you love me, but is it enough to carry you through the hard times? I told you once that I was married before, to Margaret, she was miserable here. Our lives were torn apart by her inability to cope with life in these mountains. We started out in Pennsylvania, but I wound up back in Cuter Gap again! She hated it here, when she came down with Typhoid there was no fight left in her anymore. She didn't want to go on living.

"when I went to Baltimore I left because I thought you had chosen the road that was best of you. I didn't tell you that I loved you before I left because I wanted to believe that life with Grantland was the best life for you. But I couldn't be without you. I told you why at Ingle's Cove. I know you feel the same way about me, but can you honestly leave all of the comforts you've known for a life with me here in the cove?

Grantland could offer you everything that you're used to. He will leave here one day probably for a church in the city somewhere. I have a meager…humble existence here. I need these people, these mountain's and everything that goes with them.

I want you to think about all of this seriously before you walk down that aisle on Friday. I can't stand the thought of putting you through what Margaret went through!

I looked at him with concern. "Neil?" I began, but he put his finger on my lips to quiet me.

"No, Christy. I want you to give this some serious thought. Don't' jump to any conclusions. I want you to be sure that marrying me is what you want out of life. I told you before, more then anyone I know you deserve to get what you want out of life. I want you to be happy. Pray about your decision."

He took my hand and led me back to the mission house. "I'll see you tomorrow, Christy."

"Don't I even get a kiss good-bye?" I asked.

Neil shook his head sorrowfully, "No, I don't want to confuse you further. I'm not going to try to persuade you one way or the other. This decision has to be from your heart. Not your head or your emotions." Neil took my hand and held it to his heart.

"I do admire what you've done Christy. Your determination, your strength. Giving up your life in Asheville couldn't have been easy for you. The fact that you're staying even after your salary cut. I know there's something that draws you to remain here. Please don't think I'm trying to push you away, for that's the last thing I want to happen. But I'd rather you found out your true feelings now then after we're married. The chances of my moving away from here permanently, at least in the near future, are very slim indeed." He placed his hand on my cheek. "I only want you to be sure you're doing the right thing."

I felt tears in my eyes. I put my arms around his neck. "I love you Neil."

He put his arms around me, almost reluctantly. "I love you too Christy." He paused as he took my arms from around his neck, "We will have hard times ahead Christy. But we will also have glorious times as well. You have to weigh your decision on what you know, and what you *don't* know, which do you want to follow-the straight and familiar or the winding and intricate?"

Then he patted my hand and turned toward the barn. I wanted to say something, to stop him from leaving, but I knew he wanted me think about this. I watched him enter the barn to saddle Duke. I wanted to go into the barn and argue, but I knew it was no use at the moment. Once he was in the barn I turned and walked into the mission house. Miss Alice, my parents, and Ruby Mae were in the Parlor. I couldn't face anyone right now, so I went straight to my room. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	14. The Refutation

**__**

The Revelation ~ The Refutation

I thought about Neil's words most of the night. I sat up all night praying and thinking. Weighing the facts, just as Neil told me to do. But I shut out everything else and listened to my heart. God speaks to your heart and that's where you'll find the path that He wants you to follow. So I was listening for the still small voice of God. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

In the morning I went down deliberately late. I didn't want to eat breakfast. But I did want to speak to my parents before Neil came today.

I found mother in the kitchen and I asked to speak to her privately. We went up to my bedroom to talk. Once I closed the door I couldn't seem to turn to face my mother who was already sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Mother?" I paused. "Neil asked me to think about some things before the wedding, now I'm sure I'm doing to right thing, but he wants me to be positively sure that I am not making a mistake. He has his doubts as to whether or not I will be able to handle living here. When he gets called away from home so often. Living with the hatred, suffering, hardship and suffering. He's been wondering how long I'll be able to do without the comforts of Asheville before I get tired of living here.

"He wants me to think about this and give him my answers later today."

"Only you can answer this question my dear. I know how much you love it here. I've seen how well you've learned to fit in with the people. Your heart is here. When I see you back in Asheville you are still anxious to be here. I can not give you the answers that you seek, only you can find those answers in your heart." Mother gave me a gentle kiss on the cheek and headed toward the door.

"Mother, I think you realize that I'm going to have some time alone with Neil when he comes today. So could you help to take over for things here while I'm not available?"

"Of course my dear!" Then mother opened the door and walked out, closing it behind her.

I didn't have a clear-cut answer from my mother, but at least she didn't say that I was making a mistake! Now I wanted to talk to my father to get his opinion. By the look of the sky I knew I had to find my father soon before Neil arrived. 

I searched the mission grounds, finding my father in the barn speaking to Dr. Ferrand. 

"Daddy, may I speak to you in private?"

"Of course Girlie! How about I take my little girl for one last walk, while she's still my 'Girlie'?"

"That sounds very good Daddy!"

When we were out of earshot of the Mission I began, "Daddy, I want your honest opinion about something. Now I want you to tell me exactly what you think, don't try to hide your feelings from me trying not to hurt my feelings. I want to know your most honest opinion, do you promise?"

"Yes, Girlie, I do." Daddy paused. "But what is it that has you so flustered all of a sudden?"

"You see Daddy, Neil asked me last night, to think about something before the wedding. He doesn't want me to make a mistake that I will regret for the rest of my life. He said that he wants me to think about living here with him. Am I going to be able to handle life here with the suffering and pain? Plus his not being away from home so often. My question to you Daddy is that do you think I'm able to handle life here?"

"Girlie, I have watched you here with these people longer then your mother, since I was here weeks before your mother arrived last Thanksgiving. I watched you with the children, with Miss Alice as well as with David and Neil. Girlie, if anyone is meant to live here as Neil's wife, I believe it's you. But if you feel in your heart that you shouldn't marry Neil, then I suggest that you don't do it. But I've seen you and Neil together, and I feel that you'll be miserable without each other. 

"Girlie, only you know what is going on in your heart. If God is telling you something different, then you know you should follow God."

"I know Daddy. I don't feel that God is leading me to do anything different, but Neil seems to have some doubts about me. How do I convince him that I'm sincere?"

"Neil's a true gentleman, Christy. Speak to him from your heart and he'll know that you're telling him the truth. I'm sure of it." 

We had arrived back at the mission now. I noticed Duke hitched up out in front of the mission house. I was anxious to see Neil again, but I was nervous about speaking to him today. 

Daddy and I walked into the mission; Neil was sitting at the dining table having tea with mother and Miss Alice. I sort of felt sorry for him! It made me smile! 

I walked up behind him and hugged his neck. He looked rather lonely at this table! But he was taking it all in stride. He truly was a gentleman. 

"Would you like to go for a walk Dr. MacNeill?" I whispered to him.

He turned his head to look at me, "Yes please, Miss Huddleston!" He smiled shyly.

I took his hand and he excused himself from the table. "Can we go for a ride instead, Christy? I'd like to get away from everyone to talk more freely. If you don't mind."

"No I don't mind Neil. I'll saddle Buttons." We headed for the barn.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

We rode to Ingle's Cove again. This was becoming 'our' spot…I think! We rode in almost complete silence. 

We dismounted. "It doesn't look like ran does it, Neil?" I teased. 

"Ah, no Christy, it doesn't appear so." Neil smiled.

I took his hand; he stood back and looked at my hand in his. "It's alright Neil, I promise."

We walked up to the top of the ridge to look out again. "Well, Christy? What have you decided?"

"Neil, I've thought all night long about what you told me last night. There is just nothing about what you said that has changed my mind about marrying you. I've lived here for over a year. I know I've made mistakes here and I've tried to rush into things that maybe I should have just left alone, but I've always tried to help out the people of the cove whenever I could." I turned to look Neil in the eyes. I picked up his other hand and stood gazing into his eyes. "I love you Neil. To tell you the truth, there are times when I miss Asheville, but you know something? If I left here to move back home, I'd miss you more then anything. Yes, we maybe don't know each other as well as David and I know each other, but my heart belongs to you. Like I told you at your apartment that night, when I'm not with you it's even difficult for me to breathe! I lay awake at night thinking about you, I see your face every time I close my eyes, I hear your voice on every breeze, I can't live another day without you!" I was fighting the lump in my throat, so I was whispering as I finished speaking. "Please don't turn me away, Neil! I've got friends here in the cove! Opal, Miss Alice, Ruby Mae, the Spencer's, I know everyone around here and they are accepting me more all the time. I have the school and the children. When you aren't at home, I'll still have friends to turn to. I love these mountains because they give me strength! I won't be like Margaret. You know that I have more to live for here then I do anywhere else!" I moved as close as I could to Neil. "But most of all I could never find anyone, anywhere that would be as loving and kind as you!" I dropped his hands and put my arms around his neck. "I love you Neil MacNeill, and that fact is not going to change, even if you turn me away!"

Neil smiled and drew me into him. "Oh Christy! I can't live without you either! I can't tell you how happy you've made me!" He leaned down and kissed me ardently. 

"Tomorrow I'll be Mrs. Neil MacNeill!" I declared.

Neil smiled broadly. "That sounds so good Christy! I can hardly wait to call you Mrs. MacNeill!"

"I'm sorry to ruin this moment Neil, but if we are going to have a wedding tomorrow we had better get back to the mission and finish up the work that needs to be done!" I stated. "You're going to stay and help, aren't you?"

Neil drew me closer, "Only if you promise me another walk in the moonlight tonight!"

"I think that can be arranged, Neil!" I winked at him. "I know of a wonderful spot on a ridge overlooking the mountains where we can be surround by millions of stars!"

"That sounds wonderful Christy!!" Neil said as he kissed me again.

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~


	15. The Wedding Day

**__**

The Revelation ~ The Wedding

The morning of our wedding turned out to be more spectacular then I ever imagined it could! The sun was shining bright and there was just the slightest breeze blowing. It wasn't too cold considering it was autumn and the temperature could have dipped without warning, but it didn't. My prayers had been answered for this day. Nearly everything was ready for our day. The only thing that I was to concern myself with today, according to my mother anyway was to make myself beautiful for my husband! As I looked in the mirror this morning I felt rather plain and ordinary. I wondered how I would achieve beauty from the person I saw looking back at me this morning! Suddenly I felt inadequate for the task set before me. Not just in 'making myself beautiful' but for everything that I would be presented with today…marriage, a husband, a home and eventually a family! There were a lot of responsibilities involved in this marriage today. I had been so busy up to this point thinking, planning, preparing, not to mention hunting down Neil to tell him that I did indeed love him! I hadn't the time to think about the responsibilities that lay ahead…I prayed silently for wisdom and strength. After the past few days and spending an entire evening praying and thinking about this decision one last time before we were married I knew that this was the path I was to follow and that I was to continue to embark on it. I had now doubts as to what I was to do today but I wondered how I would handle my new life. Would I be a good wife for Neil? What about this evening? Would I be a disappointment to him? Would I be a good mother one day? As much as I continued to ad the words 'one day' to that statement I knew that the chances were very great that it might be 'one day-soon'! 

I slowly brushed out my hair and wondered what Neil was doing this morning. Was he having the same thoughts as I was? Was he as nervous as I? Did he have any doubts or regrets about asking me to marry him? We had been friends almost since the day I moved to the cove, our friendship had only grown deeper with time and had blossomed, almost without our realizing it, into true love. We had been through hard times together already, I had proven to him that I could help him in his medical practice and I hoped to continue to do even more of that after we were married. It would cut down on the amount of time that we were separated from each other. Everything about our lives was going to change drastically. I knew how Neil and I could argue! What would happen when we were with each other every single day? I hadn't been accustomed to coming to Neil with my problems, but now I would be expected to do that, as of course it should be. Nothing would be easy, but as my father told me, and I observed myself, Neil was first and foremost a gentleman. He would help me out to the best of his ability, as I would try to do for him. 

Mother had come to check up on me this morning. I told her I was doing all right, at least for the moment anyway. I didn't have regrets about today, but I did have questions! All of which could not be answered by anything but time and experience. 

How strange life and love seemed at that moment, in my eyes! I had lived all of my life in Asheville, pampered, spoiled, sheltered, but with parents who were giving and understanding. Moving to these mountains to be a teacher…oh! That first trip up that mountain! It was a day to remember! The feuding, violence, hatred, death, destruction, desolation, disease, every evil imaginable lived in these mountains; they were awful, yet beautiful. Yes this was the life I had chosen, this was the life that God would have me lead, it was the life that I loved more then anything else in the world! It was where I belonged. It was where I found true love. Yes, Love! I chuckled slightly to myself. Love. In the midst of everything going on around us, we had found true love and happiness. I closed my eyes and pictured Neil in my mind. That was where I had found true love in the heart of the mountain doctor whom I had witnessed that first day I arrived in the cove! I pictured those eyes that looked so intently at me back on that first day as he bent over Bob Allen to examine him and he had told me specifically to 'step aside please'. I remembered how wild his hair had been and how he had come riding in and completely took command of the situation the moment he arrived! I smiled at the look on his face a month later when David left me at Neil's cabin after I fell into the river and got soaked to the skin! The look on his face as he turned around and saw me in his wife's dress. The argument we had about the shooting of Tom McHone, as well as his contempt at least at first, of our mission. Then I moved forward to the thoughts of only a month ago…the desperation in his face as he said, "I'm in love with you, and I've come back here to ask you to marry me!" My reaction was one of shock, but I was trying to remain true to the decision that I had made to marry David. Of course it wasn't until later that I looked back and realized the mistake I was making. The night David had offered to hang the moon for me, I was having doubts about marrying David, but I wouldn't admit that those feelings were anything more then pre-wedding jitters. I was flustered and confused, but didn't accept the fact until later that they were all misgivings about marrying David, and wondering how Neil was doing alone in Baltimore! I could still feel my heart thrill as he spoke to me upon his return to the mission! I had never felt emotions like that before. Of course, now I realize that it was the love I felt for him that made my heart race so. There was so much to be thankful for! So much to wonder about! 

Ruby Mae's knocking on my door jolted me back to reality. "Come in!" I called.

"Miz Christy? Is there anything you'd like for me to do for yah this morning?" Ruby Mae offered.

"Not that I can think of at the moment, Ruby Mae, but thank-you! If you hear any news of Dr. MacNeill, would you please tell me right away?"

"What news are yah talkin about Miz Christy?" 

"Oh, when he arrives, if he's nervous! If he's having any second thoughts about today?"

"I'll let yah know if I hear anything Miz Christy. He ain't here yet though. I don't expect he'll be here for quite sometime yet. I hope he don't get called away on an emergency today!"

"Oh no! I never thought about that Ruby Mae! Now I've got one more thing to worry about!"

"I'm sorry Miz Christy! I didn't mean tah make yah worry about anythin!"

"That's all right Ruby Mae! I guess I'm looking for things to worry about today!!"

"Why on earth would yah do that fer?"

"I don't know! I'm worried that Dr. MacNeill might suddenly change his mind or something will go wrong and we can't actually get married today."

"I don't think yah have tah worry about Doc! He's right fond of yah Miz Christy! I see it in his eyes when he looks at yah! Even when yah ain't lookin at him. He's a special way of lookin at yah that he ain't got with no one else!"

"Really Ruby Mae? I never noticed that."

"Well, maybe cause you're lookin at him the same way! But I seen it! From both of yah! There's a spark in your eyes that ain't there for no one but the Doc! Just the same as he has for you!"

"Thank-you Ruby Mae! That makes me feel better! I appreciate that!" 

"Are you sure there ain't nothing I can do fer yah?"

"Ruby Mae, you've already done more for me then you realize!!"

"Could I help brush out yer hair?" 

"That would be nice Ruby Mae, thank-you! I have to admit my hands are little shaky today."

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

The morning pasted quickly. Ruby Mae presented me with my grandmother's veil, the one that she and Zady and Clara and some of my other student's had worked to sew the seed pearls on to for me! I was so pleased that I broke down and cried. Ruby Mae thought I was disappointed, but I assured her that they were tears of joy, not sadness!! 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Mother came later in the afternoon and put up my hair for me. She helped me with my gown and positioning the veil. I looked at myself in the mirror, mother looked over my shoulder, "I hope I don't trip."

"You won't dear, just put one foot *slowly* in front of the other." 

"You look just like a princess." I smiled at her.

"Thank-you mother."

"Christy, I just have to say that you have made the right decision."

"Do you really think so?"

"I've never told you this, but when I was your age there was another man in my life besides your father. And I had a choice to make too. I know how hard it can be to hold the hearts of two men in your hands. But I also know the relief of finally giving one of them back."

"Even if its broken?"

"Time heals all wounds Christy. Even a broken heart."

"I hope so."

"And in the mean time there is a wonderful man down there waiting to begin a new life with you." Mother paused. "Are you ready?"

I smile, "I am now!"

Mother walked to the door and opened it. "William, we're ready!" Mother announced.

Daddy walked into the bedroom. "You look beautiful Girlie!" 

"Thank-you Daddy!"

"Are you ready to take one last walk with me as my Girlie?"

"Yes, Daddy. But I'll always be your Girlie!"

Daddy smiled and offered me his arm. Mother handed me my bouquet and we walked out the door and down the hall, outside and down the stairs. 

Ruby Mae and Zady were waiting at the foot of the stairs for me. 

"You look as pretty as a pumpkin patch." Ruby Mae declared to me.

"Thank-you Ruby Mae." I answered.

"Are you ready Zady?" She nodded her head.

Ruby Mae announced our arrival.

It was a wonderful day, a day that I will never forget as long I shall live. I still felt somewhat anxious walking down the aisle, but the amazing look on Neil's face as he approached me at the end of the aisle, I knew then that my fears were all unfounded! I had never seen a man so much in love and eager to be married! He was absolutely beaming! 

I was relieved to hear Neil say 'I do', I swallowed hard as Dr. Ferrand turned to me and set my vows out before me, but I knew I was doing the right thing and it was easy for me to say 'I do' also! I couldn't help but smile! I had truly made the choice of my heart!!

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

The End of Fan Fiction: ~*~Choice of My Heart~*~ Omitted Scenes/The Revelation


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